


Fall

by sythlar



Series: when the going gets toph [1]
Category: Avatar (TV), Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: F/M, Gen, don't read the first four chapters if you're afraid of earthquakes, toko - Freeform, zutoph
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-22
Updated: 2015-09-18
Packaged: 2018-02-26 16:09:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 17
Words: 35,316
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2658191
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sythlar/pseuds/sythlar
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Eight years after A:TLA, Toph has feelings about Zuko. What a couple of losers. Lots of (im)mature language, because adult Toph. The first smut's in chapter 9, you perverts, I know that's all you're here for. It's definitely all I'm here for.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Toph could only handle formality for so long. The banquet was celebrating joint ventures between the Earth Kingdom and the Fire Nation, which she could really get behind, but fuck, it was the most boring thing she’d witnessed in a long time.

Even subtly pranking the guests wasn’t fun after a while. You rotate the earth under a guy to make him crash into his secret crush, you trip some asshole who’s harassing a girl, you throw pebbles into some lady’s elaborate hair until they all fall out while she’s dancing, and then what? Anything more destructive would be rude, and she actually gave a shit about her hosts.

Seated at the Firelord’s right hand as a guest of honor, she'd stayed as long as she had to out of politeness to Iroh and Zuko. Then she booked it. She didn’t even know this part of the palace that well, but it didn’t matter. Anywhere was better than the banquet hall. She ended up in the gardens, which were more extensive than she expected. There was a nice corner between a few hedges, conveniently out of anyone line of sight, with some grass and a boulder. She bent a niche for her head and reclined on the rock, taking a long, deep breath.

Familiar footsteps resonated in the distance, but it took at least a half an hour for them to pitter-patter all over the garden maze and stumble upon her resting spot. The idiot kept opening gates and walking around obstacles instead of hopping over them or burrowing under them.

When he finally got there, he was quiet for a long time. Maybe he’d just leave and assume she didn’t know he was there--but no, he wasn’t that clueless.

“The stars are beautiful tonight,” the Firelord said.

“If you say so.” There was a chill in the air and the scent of burning wood, a combination that promised winter soon, even here near the equator. She made herself focus on that, and not his presence. Maybe he'd still go away. “Everyone says that, but it doesn’t mean much to someone who’s never seen them.”

“Some nights you can’t see as many, or they look weak and far away.” He sat down on the grass beside her. “They’re spread out across the sky when you look up at night like...metal embedded in rock, I guess. Tonight there aren’t any clouds blocking the view, and it’s a new moon. The stars stand out. Some of them even look like they’re pulsing with life in many different colors, like dragon fire. Actually, you came to the darkest part of the gardens, and the stars are bright enough that I can see you by their light.”

Toph closed her eyes, trying to imagine what he described, but her mind defied her, as it usually did. Color meant nothing to her. It was something that let seeing people differentiate between identical objects, and there were a thousand names for these different colors, and none of it meant anything.

“Have you always been blind?” Zuko asked quietly.

“Yeah.” She opened her eyes and turned towards his voice. “I was born with my eyes like this. Cloudy and green, right? I don’t know exactly what, but some part of them is missing, so they’ve never worked.” She shrugged. “Other than physical details and color, I don’t miss much.”

“I know. I couldn’t believe my eyes when you beat someone at Pai Sho tonight.”

“All the expensive sets are carved, not just painted. Are you smiling, Sparky?” She grinned. “I’ve never heard you smile before.” On an impulse, she raised her hand to his face and touched his lips. That was a mistake, she told herself. A mistake. Stop. He was smiling, broadly at first, though he closed his lips when she started to touch them. Her fingertips trailed down to his chin and along his jaw. He was clean-shaven, with only a hint of stubble in a few places. Her fingers reached higher, along his cheeks, and then he had her wrists in his hands.

“I don’t think you want to see that,” he murmured.

“What, your scar? Everyone else gets to.” With her fingers still on his face, she knew he didn’t find that humorous, but he still let go of her hands.

The skin on that side of his face transitioned abruptly from smoothness to damage; it had been a tightly controlled burst of fire, Toph realized. She swallowed against the horror of that thought. A father had intentionally delivered this injury, knowing full well that his son would be scarred for life at the very least. The remaining skin had formed into ridges that sometimes ran parallel and sometimes crossed each other, leaving the entire area like a hilly island on his face. Nearer the eye, the damage was more severe, the ridges deeper and drier. With one hand tracing the outline of each eye, she compared them. The burned one was permanently half-closed, even when his eyes were open. He closed them, and she felt the deep scarring on the lid. Ozai had been aiming for his son’s eyes. The horror had never reached her when it was a story about a prince; feeling the damage on a friend’s face was a different experience.

“I had no idea it was like this.” Her hands traced his skin back to his neck and upward, comparing what each hand felt, pushing his hair out of the way as she moved. His ear was burned badly enough that most of the outer structure was missing.

“It feels wrong to complain when you’re blind,” Zuko said quietly.

“Being born without something just happens. It’s nature. This isn’t.”

“I know. It’s ugly.”

“That’s not what I meant.” Somehow, she’d ended up with his face cradled between her hands. A  _mistake_. “I mean that what happened to you was so wrong, but you’ve won. You’re here, and you’re whole. That doesn’t just happen, you earned it.”

His breathing changed in a way she hadn’t heard before.

“What?” she asked, going cold. She started to pull her hands away.

“Don’t.” He caught her wrists again. “Toph, may I kiss you?”

She hadn’t expected that.  _No, go away._  “Yes.”

His breath against her skin was hot, and she could feel his heart racing through the earth beneath them. His lips brushed hers once, then a lingering second time, warm and tender. By the time they drew away from each other, Toph could feel that her face was flushed.

“You probably don't care," he murmured, "but you're very beautiful."

His words shocked her into reality again. She straightened, took a deep breath. "We shouldn't be doing this."

"Why not?" He touched her chin, and it took all her self control not to kiss him again, harder, in defiance of her own common sense.

"You're the Firelord." She was speaking far too fast, but she couldn't slow herself down. "You need to be in there, looking for a wife who can give you stability in the Fire Nation. In the streets they're still protesting your willing release of the colonies and these people probably agr--"

"Do you think I can forget that? I inherited a kingdom in ruins. Is that what you want to talk about right now?" Eight years ago, he would have lost his temper, and it would have been easy to make him go away. But no, he'd had to grow into this reasonable man that she actually fucking respected. "For a few minutes, I just want to be Zuko."

"I'm not infringing on your identity. Personally, I think the Firelord and Zuko are the same person, and trying to separate them is your problem. If you pulled your head out of your ass for a second, you might recall that I'm Toph Beifong, and I was no less Toph in that banquet hall than I am out here, telling you to pull your head out of your ass." She sighed. "Look, I care about you. Any idiot can see that; I don't usually stick around anywhere but my school, I hate formality, and I’ve been at the palace a week."

"The kiss was a pretty big hint, too."

She ignored him. "But where is this going? You're doing important work here. I'm not exactly helping with that. If I'm a distraction, I should leave before we hurt each other."

"That's the problem." She could feel him running his fingers through his hair, mostly because he knocked his metal headpiece awry. It was supposed to be pure gold, but there was a lot of earth in it, she realized idly. "When you're here, you make me think more clearly. I get bogged down in all this guilt and anger and you cut right through it and show me what I have to do. I think I need you to be here, Toph."

"I'm blind and rude," she reminded him, "and Earth Kingdom nobility. If I stick around, you're going to have problems."

"I'll have more if you don't," he said quietly. "I've already decided not to marry for political advantage. My family has been doing that for generations and it ended in insanity."

"That's stupid. You're stupid. If they hadn’t been doing that for generations, they would have lost control of the entire country."

"I don't care. Toph, stay another month. Train your students here with my soldiers. Come with me to visit Yu Dao in two weeks." He reached for her hand, and she slapped him away.

With that, she’d finally riled his temper; he exhaled a firey-hot breath, his heart beating hard.

"You don't understand, you unbelievable moron," she growled. “If I stay here, we’re going to fall in love.”

"That's why I'm asking you to stay!" he snapped back. "I'm already in love with you!"

For a long moment, the only sound was the lazy chirp of crickets.

"This is a mess, Sparky," she murmured. She reached for his hand, feeling his anger melt away, pulling him closer and closer until she could feel his body heat and smell whatever scent he'd been sprayed with for the stupid event. It didn’t suit him. He put his arms around her, and she leaned against him, listening to his voice echo in his chest. They must have looked like morons, sitting in the darkest corner of the garden, hugging next to a huge-ass boulder.

"Yeah," he murmured. "But we'll make it work."


	2. First Date

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clitoris prohibitus.

She was the one who had suggested meeting quietly the next night if he wanted to be just Zuko. Suki was exactly the friend Toph needed for that; she informed the Kyoshi Warriors, quietly, that the Firelord may be visited by a clever earthbender around midnight, and not to be alarmed.

In the morning, she'd gone out to the marketplace and found a nice chunk of gold. It was small and just impure enough to be malleable, but they still overcharged her. After dinner alone in her room, she passed the time figuring out exactly how she wanted it to look and feel.

At midnight, she earthbent her way into Zuko's room. She could feel him standing there, his pulse quickening when she stepped in and closed the wall behind her. She beckoned him closer, and he walked up without hesitation.

Damn him, he was tall. She could hear his breathing and the rustle of his clothing and realized his chest was at her eye level. She reached forward and traced the lines of his clothes over his chest; regular cotton, not Firelord finery. Good. All of that touching had his pulse racing, though.

"So we're on a date. Where do you want to go, Sparky?" she asked, returning her hands to her hips, where they damn well belonged.

"I, uh, I was planning tea in the side room. I'm pretty good at making it."

"Right, you worked in your uncle's shop during the war." She'd forgotten.

"Yeah." He led the way into the next room, pulling open a door in a decorative partition wall for her. There was a nice table in the center of the room, a pai sho set, and a full tea service. She sat opposite him, cross-legged on the floor.

"Doesn't the Fire Nation have a tea ceremony tradition?"

"Yes, but I don't know any. They've been out of fashion for at least a hundred years. I learned to make tea in your country." She could hear the hint of a smile, or smirk, or something in his voice as he portioned out the tea and heated the pot in his hands.

"Ba Sing Se is the worst city I've ever been to," she said, "but the tea was pretty good."

"Uncle says it's a lot better now. The Dai Li are gone and the Earth King is married. I hear it's peaceful."

"You haven't been?"

"No. I haven't felt safe leaving the capital without leaving strong leadership here. I'd trust Uncle to act as regent, but aside from attending the banquet, which was a surprise, he doesn't want to leave his shop or get involved."

"He's going to have to," Toph shrugged. "It's too important for him to just blow off like that. But, hey, I thought you wanted to be just Zuko tonight. We can discuss this later."

She could actually feel him relax as she said that, the hidden tension in his body draining. He reached for her cup and poured out her tea, passing it back to her carefully.

"Thanks," she murmured, cradling it in her hands. "It's cold; tea was a good choice."

There was a silence, and a strange fluctuation in his vitals. She listened intently as he spoke. "If you're cold, come sit next to me."

Intrigued, she put her teacup down and walked around the table, sitting a handspan away from him. He cupped his hands, and from the sudden heat she knew he'd created a little flame in them; she ran her hands over it, smiling at the warmth.

"Firebenders don't get cold, you know," he said. "We can warm our own bodies in cold environments."

"That's a nice perk." She toasted both sides of her left hand. The right snuck up behind him, slowly. "Is it automatic, or do you have to know where the cold is?" Abruptly, she touched the cold back of her hand to his neck.

"Toph!" he shouted.

"So you have to know," she grinned.

He made a strange, quiet sound that Toph identified, after a moment, as a weak-ass Zuko laugh. "Yes, I have to know. I can't keep myself warm when I'm asleep or unconscious."

"What about that time you burned my feet?"

"I--that was--I woke up to do that. I mean, I wasn't awake enough to know it was you, but I--I wasn't asleep."

She was already laughing. "You go from romantic to awkward so fast, Sparky. It's like you're trying to set a record. Is this how you always are with girls?"

He ran a hand through his hair, and it sailed through smoothly. He must be wearing it loose. "My previous girlfriends had nice, linear, romantic conversations with me instead of throwing me for a loop twice a minute."

"If my main ambition in life was getting laid by the Firelord, I'd probably talk like that, too."

He had the temerity to act embarrassed, picking up his tea to mask it.

"It's only my side ambition," she added.

He coughed, midswallow.

"You're the one who begged me to stay a while," she reminded him, grinning, as she felt for a napkin on the table and gave it to him. "You literally asked for this."

"Surprisingly, I don't regret it." He cleaned the spilled tea and tossed the napkin back on the table. "I hope you've decided to come to Yu Dao with me, too."

"My school is outside of Yu Dao, you know, and two of my three best students are contracted by the mayor to do police work there. I'd be going that way anyway." She put her hand on his chest, over his heart. "Why are you so uneasy about it? Your heartrate is going insane."

"Most of the Fire Nation is opposed to what I'm doing there, and the Restoration movement isn't thrilled, either. Tomorrow I'm spending all day listening to my war council complain about it." He sounded ten years older when he talked about politics.

"Aw, fuck 'em." She felt his pulse change and slid her hand up, exploring his face again. "You've spent the last few years dedicating yourself to fixing this place. You're doing well. And again, you asked to be just Zuko tonight."

"Sometimes I'm not sure if I remember who Zuko is," he said.

"Get over yourself. 'Zuko' is defined by whatever you are, no matter what it is."

"I'm sorry," he said, taking a deep breath. "I'm...not great at this."

She didn't release his face, reveling in its shape. She knew his so well, and yet his face was so foreign to her. Every moment was a revelation. "Relaxing is a skill, and you're comparing yourself to me, the grandmaster. Cut yourself some slack. What you need to do is distract your mind from running in circles all the time." Her thumb ran over his lips. They were pleasantly full, though not as full as hers.

His heart was beating in a new way. A good way, but unfamiliar.

She leaned in and kissed him. His hands slipped behind her neck, untying her headband and letting the full length of her hair tumble down her back, lifting it and letting it fall like silken rain from his fingers.  
"I can come back later," said Uncle Iroh.

Toph and Zuko jerked their heads backwards. How had she missed Iroh's presence? Toph wondered. The old man wasn't exactly subtle.

But then, she'd been distracted.

"N-no," Zuko stammered. "Uncle, p-please--sit down--have--have some Jasmine tea."

Toph took a deep breath and faced the table. Iroh was shaking with suppressed laughter; she could feel it through the floor, through the table, in her very bones. If she'd been deprived of all of her senses, she was sure she would still feel Iroh's gleeful presence, somehow.

Well, at least there was no doubt that the old man approved.

Toph left a short game of pai sho later. The first date was a bust, and she knew just who to blame.

"I can't just not let Iroh in," Suki whispered. "The Firelord has a standing order to let his uncle in whenever he asks."

"Well," Toph said, irritated. "I mean, that's fair, but the fact remains that you basically clitblocked me."

"Are you kidding?" Suki hissed. "Zuko is the king of cockblocks. It's not my fault that karma is catching up with every time he ruined the moment for me and Sokka or Katara and Aang because he wasn't paying attention."  
"I didn't do anything to deserve this," Toph whined. But her mind was already barreling forward towards the next time she and Zuko could meet up. Normal date places wouldn't do, obviously. She'd have to think outside the box.

"We'll make it work," he'd told her. And they still would; just not in a conventional way. That was starting to become a pattern for them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was previously part of "Bad Dates," but I decided that all of my Toko shorts belonged in one continuous story.


	3. Second Date

When the coalbirds began to squawk at the rising sun, Toph asked one of the Kyoshi Warriors to show her the way to Iroh’s quarters.

"I hope I didn’t wake you." She was left alone with him, and he led the way to his sitting room, low pillows scattered around a large round table. It felt like a firepit; Toph idly wondered if there was a chimney in the ceiling for the smoke to escape. It would be as easy as a subtle tap, tap of her fingernails against a wall to use her seismic sense and find out, but she couldn’t be assed.

"Not at all." Iroh lowered himself to the cushions, bones creaking. "When you get to a certain age, you do not need very much sleep anymore."

Toph sat opposite him, respectfully. Unlike most of the people she’d known, the old man actually deserved her respect, now more than ever. “I want to apologize for what you saw last night.”

“Don’t worry about that. It was good to see him doing something a man his age should be doing. He has not left the city since he returned from visiting his mother," Iroh said heavily. "That was over five years ago. Until you came to stay, he didn't show emotion anymore, not even anger. I worried for him every day."

Before she could bring herself to speak again, she could feel heat from the center of the table, and knew he was shoring up the fire with his bending. Knowing Iroh, there was probably a teapot involved, too.

"I know that Zuko has to attend to his responsibilities before his personal feelings," Toph went on, slowly. "I won’t pretend anything else is the truth. But if he doesn’t relax a little, he’s going to snap. He’s doing everything with practically no help."

There was tea involved, of fucking course. She heard a clank as he hung a kettle above the fire. “He has been doing a good job," Iroh said. "But my nephew is a stubborn man, and I am in no condition to give him very much help anymore. He needs to find new people he can trust."

"I’m still working on that," Toph said wryly. "In fact, I wanted to ask your opinion on a few people. And a few touchy situations cropping up in Yu Dao."

They had tea as they discussed the court, and it was delicious, as it always was. Toph left as soon as she’d finished her cup. There were things to do.

—-

"Today we’re going to talk about what can and cannot be ignited!" Toph’s voice was loud enough to carry across the training yard and echo off the outer palace walls. A staggered row of trainees stood before her; nine of her own lily-livered students, wildly disparate in age and disposition, and nine men and women of the Firelord’s army, standing at ease. In the corner was the Firelord’s steward, his brow already furrowed. Toph had already forgotten the man's name. "What burns? Wood. Plants. Hair. Things that can be waterbent." She flicked her fingers dismissively. "We don’t care. We bend metal and stone. We don’t have to worry about ignition. Right?"  
  
Her students were still for a long moment, trying to think of exceptions. They knew she loved trick questions. Sul was the one who finally said, sofly, “yes?”  
  
"NO!" she bellowed.  
  
Her students were startled, but not surprised. (Her best students wouldn't have been startled, she reflected, but she'd left them in charge of the school in her absence in exchange for half the incoming tuition.) The Fire Army soldiers were too well trained to react at all.  
  
"If our metal and rock was pure and clean, of course we wouldn’t have to worry about it. But it isn’t." She raised one hand, ripping a corner of the decorative stone roof from the palace building.  
  
"Lady Beifong!" The steward cried. "I beseech you!"  
  
"Cool it, hotman," Toph said, bringing the rock down to hover in front of her. "I know what I’m doing. Here," she said, pointing at the top surface of the rock. "Moss and shit growing all over, right? None of the stone in the training yard is gonna have this, they get scorched too often, but out in the wild? In the earth kingdom? This is everywhere. So say you’ve got a rogue firebender. You pull up your stone to block him. And, bam! Now your hair’s on fire. How’d that happen? It happened because you’re not thinking about your surroundings. You’re not thinking about all the possibilities. Remember: always stay?" she prompted them.  
  
"At least two moves ahead," her students recited.  
  
"Right. So, hotmen," she addressed the Fire soldiers, because she loved hundred-year-old slang. It gave her a default nickname for an entire nation of people at once. "Queue up. You’re gonna take turns lighting up my students. Don’t hold back. If you burn them they’ll remember the lesson."  
  
She could say one thing for Fire Nation soldiers: they knew how to obey an order. They didn’t hold back. As she supervised, her feet square on the ground and her arms locked behind her, they tore through her students one by one. Still, to her surprise, none of the novice metalbenders was burned. She counted out multiples of nine, a full rotation of sparring partners; after thirty six matches, everyone was sluggish.  
  
"Alright, yellowbellies," she shouted. "Break for dinner. I hope you enjoy it, because it might be your last. Tomorrow you’re training under the Fire Nation banner, and General Shuurai has been instructed not to give a damn about you. Dismissed!"  
  
The nervous steward showed them out, metalbenders and firebenders alike. They were shuffling. Toph hated it when they shuffled. It was such a lazy habit, and it sent careless, fuzzy shocks through the ground that grated on her nerves.  
  
She found her own way out of the military wing and back to her room, though there were surely servants hovering nearby that had been told to stay out of her way. As a hero of the Hundred Year War and a personal friend of the Firelord, she’d been granted impressive lodgings. The servant that had showed them to her had assured her that they were beautiful, but that didn’t mean very much to her. Mostly they were large, and half floored in wooden panels, so there were enormous holes in her vision. She could guess what they contained by context; one enormous patch was probably the bed, a smaller one the wardrobe and washbasin, another the writing desk on a raised dias. The bathroom was stone, fortunately, with a big tub hewn out of the rock. Toph was able to relax a little, bending herself an outcropping to sit on, and get good and clean before shaking out her clothes and putting them back on. To her frustration she hadn’t gotten much taller over time, but she’d filled out into a womanly figure, which meant she had to replace her clothes bit by bit. In the end, she didn't hate the results. Her travel clothes fit decently, probably looked the same as they used to, and her meteorite cuff was a reliable source of bending material in case of emergency. She had to work with metal epaulets some day, though. Everyone said they would look imposing, and she liked the idea of that.

It was easy enough to bend a comfortable sleeping place for herself once she was dressed, letting her hair dry over the edge of the outcropping while she picked her ears. It wasn’t long before she fell into a restful sleep.

—-

A courier knocked on the door in the middle of a pleasant dream.

"What the everloving shit do you want?"

The courier bowed so swiftly and deeply that Toph could feel a little whoosh as her head swept by. "Honored Lady Beifong, I have been sent to give you a message."

"Fine, tell me what it is."

"Honored Lady, it is written here--"

"I'm blind," Toph interrupted.

"Oh, I am so sorry, Honored Lady." The woman bowed again, and the gust of air made Toph sneeze this time. "It is directly from the Firelord. He wishes to see you now."

Huh. That was sort of how her dream had started, too. The memory made her gruffer than she intended. "Fine, whatever."

The courier bowed again. "Please follow me, Lady Beifong." Like the soldiers, the courier kept her cool against Toph's personality. She was impressed enough not to harangue the woman further on the way to the family quarters of the palace. Most of the rooms felt empty, or had a raised floor of wood or carpet that prevented her from fully 'seeing' what was inside. The room the courier brought her to was large, with a raised stone pedestal in the center that bore a table and something else. A fire was part of the arrangement. Did every room in the palace have a vent for smoke? she wondered.

To her surprise, the courier didn't follow her in, but closed the door behind her. Zuko was the only one in the room.

"What's this?" Toph asked, climbing atop the low pedestal and taking a seat beside him at the table.

"I decided to make you dinner myself." He actually sounded nervous, which amused Toph; he was the one who had actually dated before. She'd been too busy inventing an entirely new subset of bending, teaching hundreds of people to utilize it, and telling her occasional suitors to fuck right off because she was doing things.

"That's really nice," she said cautiously. "Smells like fish?"

"Gull-salmon." She could hear the hesitant smile in his voice, and he reached a hand out towards her. "Come over here and t--"

His next words were drowned out by...something. Something deeper and louder than anything she'd ever heard before, that drowned out Zuko's heartbeat and his voice and everything around Toph and left her alone. Blind.

It faded as quickly as it had come.

"--happened? Are you alright?" Zuko's voice returned, concerned, and she felt his hands gripping her shoulders tight. "You look like you're going to fall over."

"Something's happening." From some strange, detached portion of her mind that was still reeling in shock, she noted that she sounded panicked. She'd never heard herself panic before.

It began again, building up more slowly, but this time it was louder. Toph threw herself in the direction of the wall and felt her way to the door. She could feel Zuko's hands grasping at her, trying to hold her back, but she needed to get outside. She ran down the hallway by memory, scraping her shoulder against a decorative carving on the wall, and the something was becoming physical. It was rumbling.

By the time she burst out of the front gates of the palace, the ground was shaking. She fell to her hands and knees, embraced the deafening pain, and listened.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was previously part of "Bad Dates," but I decided that all of my Toko shorts belonged in one continuous story.
> 
> Originally, The Fall was going to be a one-shot. Then, I thought I'd add some extra fluffy chapters, so I started Bad Dates; it was going to be a string of ridiculous disastrous dates, leading up to more and more romance. But I couldn't make it work, for some reason. The only way I felt like I could advance the story was in a wildly different, less fluffy direction. I guess it's still disastrous, though, just not in a funny way!


	4. Shit Happens

For a few agonizing moments, Toph was the most sighted person in the world. The irony wasn’t lost on her, though she couldn’t laugh at it, not yet. Maybe not ever.

She had felt the earth shake by itself before, of course. In Gaoling, there had been earthquakes every year or so. They had been small, as earthquakes go. Her parents noticed glassware that had fallen to the ground and broken, or pictures that hung askew on the walls, and had their servants fix it; but all Toph could think about, at those times, was how much power it took to move  _that_ much earth  _that_ quickly. If one could feel how deep and widespread it was, one knew that a thousand earthbenders in unison couldn’t muster a small earthquake if they tried. Maybe a powerful spirit could, but if it was angry enough to do that, it would flatten cities before it was satisfied. It was easier not to think about it at all.

This was not a small earthquake.

She no longer had to send a shock through the earth and feel the waves that came back; the rolling quake brought an image of the entire city to her. She could feel it through the soles of her feet and the tips of her fingers, everything in sharp focus, all the way to the very outskirts of the capital. Every rattling brick building felt as though it was growing out of the earth, for that moment. Even the sandy ocean floor was brought into greater focus, and she could feel the immense weight of the ocean pressing down on her and found herself gasping for air as if she was truly drowning.

The worst of the shaking was coming. She could feel it as surely as her own heartbeat. As she knelt outside the palace gates, Toph’s mind moved quickly. It coming from miles away, almost due east, in the sea. The earth was shaking vertically, mostly. The palace was made of solid stone, but most of the city was brick. It was fall, and moss was growing on the north face of every roof, weeds through every crack in the pavement, and a city full of firebenders was about to panic.

Damage control.

She couldn’t reach the whoel city, but in the market district and the upper circle were within her range, so she settled into the best stance she could when the ground was beginning to really shake. All at once she was aware of Zuko behind her, in his own firebending stance. He moved close behind her, bracing her body with his, putting his hands on her shoulders, pushing her down. With a fast and precise movement of her hands, she sent out massive stone struts to tent the people inside a gross of buildings from the rubble. As a massive headache claimed her focus, the earth knocked her off her feet. She landed on her chest, the wind knocked out of her; and then Zuko landed on top of her, and she wheezed again, digging her fingers into the shaking ground.

There was nothing she could do to dampen the destructive waves of earth that rolled through the city. They were too powerful, even for Toph Beifong.

It felt like an eternity before the shaking stopped. In the aftermath she heard silence, and her labored breathing, and Zuko’s, and screams, and then dull footsteps.

Her students were rushing out the gate, soldiers and palace servants flooding around them. She knew it because she heard their voices; their heartbeats and breathing weren’t  _there_  when she slapped the ground for a reading. Maybe, Toph reasoned with herself, maybe she was stll in shock. Maybe the earth was still moving a little and drowning out the little sounds.

"Sifu, we need to go help people!" Toph’s youngest student, Zel, shouted.

At that moment, Toph felt she’d never been more proud of them. “You and one other stay here and assist people in the palace,” she gasped. Her lungs still felt on fire, and now the air was dusty, too."The rest of you come with me."

They went to the outskirts first, riding some nobleman’s balcony that had fallen down, two students on each side propelling the chunk of stone along the ground. They earthbent bricks off of families huddled in a corner, off of hippocows and komodo rhinos trapped in stables. Off of a mother and the crushed body of her child. Off of a home where no one had survived. Sometimes when they began to move the bricks, the rest of them would fall, and there was nothing they could do. Worst was when firebenders panicked and tried to blast the stone off, and of course, there was something flammable  _on_  the stone. Hadn’t she told them? Toph thought to herself, biting back manic laughter. Hadn’t she  _just_  lectured her students about this?

It was an hour of bloody work before Toph felt something new. Something worse.

They had lifted a piece of wall off a house when Toph turned away, shifted her feet, and wiped her eyes (it was the dust, she told herself, that was making her eyes water). Her toes sensed something, like a dough roller sliding across the ocean floor, crushing the earth beneath with its weight. It was miles away, but it was coming fast.

"Shit, motherfucker, fuck, shit," she said.

"W-what is it, sifu?" Lo Ting was one of the students that had come with her, and his familiar voice was somehow less grating now.

"Get…" she began, then paused to think. "Get four others and meet me by the docks, immediately."

It felt like an hour, but in reality it was a scant few moments before they were organized. Her students moved quickly.

"If you have ever been passionate about earthbending," Toph said to her assembled students, "this is the time to let it show."

They were certainly a ragtag group. A fat kid (Lo Ting), a short kid, a lanky teenager, a guy who always smelled like pee, and a sweet kid with an uncontrollable tic. She knew their names, but wouldn’t allow her mind the brief moments it would need to recall them. No time, not now.

"We have a mountain of water coming at us," she went on. "No idea if waterbenders would even help, but it doesn’t matter, because we don’t have any. My best idea is a wall at the shore, but keep in mind it’s gonna have to be massively thick at the bottom. You guys got anything better?"

"We can erect it in thin layers," said Pee Guy. "First a tall one at the shore, then shorter ones as we move back."

"Maybe we can make a tunnel underneath the city to take some of the water?" said Tic Girl.

"It’s just too fucking much water," Toph muttered, massaging her head. The pain was pounding, now, and beneath the throb there was the growing awareness of the wave coming closer and closer, pressing on her mind. "We could cancel the wave by concussing the earth in opposite time with it, but that…wouldn’t work, we’d have to go too deep." She knew she was grumbling to herself, almost inaudible, now, but like a turtleduck retreating into its shell, she couldn’t stop herself from pulling away in her panic.

"W-what if we raise up some pillars?" Lo Ting said hesitantly.

Toph looked up, eyes wide, and snapped. “That’s it. Not pillars,  _pillar_. We’ll raise the whole city up.”

She didn’t need to see to know her students looked doubtful. “Sifu, is that even possible?” said Pee Guy.

"For us? Have a little confidence. It’s the only option, and we’re the greatest earthbenders in the world. If we can’t do this, no one can."

She had no idea. It seemed far-fetched.

They rounded up the rest of the students and spaced themselves around the city, mostly at the outskirts, and did as Toph had taught them long ago: propelled themselves by breaking their focus into two. One half focused on adhering one chunk of earth to their feet; the other focused on pushing the other chunk of earth away. Toph stood near the center of the city, pushing her focus as far as it would go, encompassing almost all of the city within her range. As they rose, she rearranged the stone around them to create a pillar beneath their slice of earth. It was the most powerful she had ever felt; her head hurt so much it felt as though it would collapse into itself, and at the same time it was exhilarating.  _All of this is part of my body_ , she was saying with the channeling of her chi,  _and I am pushing the rest of the world away. I am raising my body up. It will be. Move to accommodate._

They inched up slowly, so slowly. A finger’s breadth, a hand’s, an arm’s length, the height of a man. Of ten men, of a hundred, and then, at Toph’s signal, they stopped. As a wall of water rose on the horizon and then crashed down around them, she sunk to the ground and the world went black.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for your comments and support! They mean so much to me. I'm working on chapter 5.


	5. Zuko

Aang, Katara, and Sokka had arrived the day after. When he saw Appa descending into the palace courtyard, Zuko was relieved for all the wrong reasons. His mind acknowledged that Aang would be able to rescue a lot of people, Katara was a massively skilled healer who would be willing to help victims out in the city, and Sokka kept a cool head in emergencies nowadays.

But in his heart he just wanted them to save Toph.

Her students had carried her into the palace on their shoulders. He wished he could banish that image from his mind: her small body, ashy and pale, limp and lifeless. It haunted him every second of the day, made worse by the fact that he couldn't be at her side. He had responsibilities, and the healers claimed she needed calm and quiet, not the Firelord working beside her.

That didn't stop him from imagining what she would advise him, if she were conscious. That was how he ended up telling her students to raise roads out of the city, then reassigned half his standing army to rescue and construction work and shipped them out of the city. It was an elegant solution to two problems at once, and he wished he could share it with her.

He received word from his mother, his sister, and the prison warden that the family was safe. Azula stayed with Mai often, now that she was a more tolerable human being, and Mai's estate was out in the western mountains, where the shaking hadn't been so bad. After a string of breakups, they'd parted ways amicably, and she'd married some young nobleman Zuko didn't know very well. He knew he and Mai weren't a good match, but he had been jealous of her happiness for a long time, until...

He thought about Toph's lifeless body again and swallowed the pain and anxiety. After a lifetime of practice, he was pretty good at being a meaningless container for angst.

At least when Appa arrived he had friends around.

Aang was the first one to reach him, and he hugged him hard. They were like brothers, or at least what Zuko imagined normal brothers were like. Who did he have as a role model for brotherly love, anyway? His father and his uncle? Not helpful.

"We came as soon as we heard," Aang said. He was a grown man now, of course, but somehow Zuko always remembered him as the child he'd been when they first met. He still had the same sincere expression on his face, though the features had changed. "What can we do to help?"

"Katara needs to look at Toph," Zuko blurted. Twenty four years old, and he still couldn't make his tongue do his bidding.

"I knew it," said Sokka, jumping down from Appa's saddle. "Only Toph would be crazy enough to lift an entire city up five hundred feet." He reached up to help his sister down.

Katara was sliding from Appa's back, a long red and orange cloak around her shoulders. She'd taken to wearing air nomad clothing sometimes after she and Aang had married. "What happened to her?"

"She collapsed afterwards. That's all the healers know."

Katara didn't delay; she was already going to the medical wing, and the three men followed.

—-

Aang took Appa to help some of the smaller coastal villages, which had probably been lashed by both the quake and the wave afterwards. Sokka, who knew Toph's students well, took them out to build shelters in the outer neighborhoods of the capital.

Katara had plenty to do in the medical wing, and even Zuko knew that babysitting his worries was the most irritating part of her job. That didn't mean he could stop himself.

"She's still the same," Katara said gently.

"Do you know what's wrong with her?" Even to his own ears, Zuko's voice was almost unrecognizable; hushed, strained, thick with anxiety. It had been a bad three days.

"I couldn't detect anything big," she said hesitantly, "and neither could your healers. Aang thinks something went wrong with the flow of her chi, since she was pushing her limits."

When Toph was in motion, performing the harsh, powerful forms that were typical of earthbending, she seemed immovable. Now, it was obvious how delicate her body was. She looked small and fragile, her long black hair a tangled halo around a face that looked as though it were made of cold porcelain and not living flesh. Her chest rose and fell with the strength of a butterfly's wing, a tiny flutter of life, beautiful and fleeting.

"She's tough," Katara went on, following her friend's gaze. "She'll pull through this, Zuko."

"I know," he lied.

—-

He wasn't sleeping anymore.

Five days after the earthquake, he could feel the bags under his eyes and the constant pressure of fatigue weighing down his limbs. Honestly, he couldn't make himself care.

He went to see Toph in place of his daily firebending practice. He couldn't bend; it reminded him of the countless duels they'd fought in that very training field. That had probably been when he first fell in love with her.

She was the same each time he saw her. Once, he touched her cheek, and her flesh was cold and clammy.

The Firelord never cried, but on the fifth night, Zuko did. Alone in his room, he buried his face in his hands and let it out until he had no more tears left to cry, just a hollow feeling inside.

\---

Afterwards, he went back to Toph, though it was near midnight. Katara pulled up a chair for him and poured him some water, as if he were visiting her home and not Toph's sickbed. Katara looked haggard, too, her hair loopies asymmetrical and her necklace askew, but Zuko knew he looked even worse. He hadn't bothered with a mirror in a while. Even on his better days, all they showed him was an ugly scar and a face that looked more like Ozai's every day.

"Zuko, be honest with me," Katara murmured, pressing the cup of water into his hands. "We're all worried for her, but you're obsessing. What's bothering you?"

The water was surprisingly soothing. Had he been remembering to eat and drink? Zuko wondered. His steward had probably tried to force him. He couldn't remember. "I asked her to stay longer. She could've been back at her school and safe right now."

"And, what, most of the people in your city would have died?"

He looked at the floor. Glared at it, really.

"No one can stop Toph from doing crazy things, anyway," Katara went on gently. "That's how she is. She knows the risks she takes. Do you think anyone could have stopped her?"

"No." He ran his fingers through his hair. A few hours of crying and raging had left it greasy and limp.

"Besides, you shouldn't give up. If she's held on this long, she's probably holding on for good. She's young and healthy. Her body just needs time to recover."

The last reserves of self-control he possessed were draining out of his body. He rested his eyes on the heels of his hands, rubbing them mercilessly. "She can't die," he muttered. "I love her too much."

"We all do." Katara put her hand on his shoulder.

"No," he said harshly, looking up with red-rimmed eyes. "I'm  _in_   _love_  with her, Katara. I told her I loved her, and she said it was a bad idea. She said we'd both get hurt." He was rambling now, but he couldn't stop the flow of words anymore. "But she stayed anyway, just a little while longer, because I asked her to. I never thought she'd be the one who got hurt."

She stared at him for a long moment, her expression unreadable. "You and Toph? Really?"

"Yeah. I know it seems odd, but we just...fit. I'm happiest when I'm with her." He sighed, running a hand through his hair again. "I don't know what she sees in me. Maybe nothing. A few days ago I was agonizing about how much I want to marry her, and exactly how hard she'd turn me down if I ever asked, but that doesn't matter anymore. I just want her to make it."

"I don't care what Aang and Sokka are going to say," Katara said softly. "I think that's really sweet. And you know, I'm pretty sure you're going to get a chance to ask her, so maybe you should make plans for that."

He thought about it. For the first time in days, he almost smiled. "Do you think there's even a chance she'd say yes?"

Katara shrugged. "There's only one way to find out."


	6. Awake

The thing most people didn’t realize about Toph was that she was always conscious for a while before she opened her eyes. Being blind, she wasn’t eager to see a new day in the morning; if she was, she'd lazily rest a toe on the ground or a finger on a brick wall. It was more restful to keep her eyes closed while she was laying down, so she did. She’d never really thought about it until now.  
  
Drifting slowly back to the waking world, she heard running water first. It was a gentle trickle, as if from a small fountain rather than a faucet, but she was sure she was indoors. It didn’t really concern her very much; it soothed her sharp headache and let her rest easily. Since she was on a bed she couldn’t feel much of the earth around her, but she was fine with that. In her condition, she didn’t really give a shit.  
  
But when a familiar voice started singing a sweet lullaby about the Southern Lights making a colorful show in the sky, she finally decided it was time to take a stand.  
  
Her eyelashes were stuck together, and so were her chapped lips, but it was easier to pry her mouth open. Her tongue was painfully dry as she rolled it around her mouth, trying to make words come out.  
  
"Air Queen," she croaked. "Shut the fuck up."  
  
"Toph!" Cold hands on her forehead, and the hum of healing water. "How are you feeling?"  
  
"Thirsty. Is Zuko okay?"  
  
Katara laughed and carefully bent some of the healing water into her mouth. “Is that better? I’ll fill up a cup for you.”  
  
"Yeah." Carefully, she pushed herself up on her elbows, and her head only spun a little. "Is Zuko okay?" she repeated, concerned.  
  
"Yes, of course. Why wouldn’t he be? He keeps coming by to check on you."  
  
Toph exhaled a breath she didn’t know she’d been holding. “Okay. How long have I been out, and what’s been happening?”  
  
"Lay back down," Katara ordered her, pressing a wooden cup into her hand. "You’re not ready to jump back into action yet."  
  
Grudgingly, she obeyed.

It turned out she’d been sleeping for a week, and Aang thought she had bent so har she sprained her chi, or some crazy shit. "The way you earthbent was really permanent for some reason," Katara finished, after a solid rundown of where everyone was and what they were doing. "So your students just built roads from the hill instead of trying to lower it back down again."

  
She knew why; it was how she’d sliced and layered the earth to raise them up. Her students had followed her lead and done a lot of the heavily lifting, but most of them probably didn't grasp the overarching strategy. It had been the fastest and strongest way to do the job. She took a long swig of water as Katara continued.  
  
"Anyway, everyone is talking about you saving the city."  
  
Toph shrugged. “It was mostly my students. They’re actually pretty good in a crisis. Who knew?”  
  
Katara laughed. “Sokka claimed he knew you were responsible as soon as he saw the capital on an island.”  
  
Toph smiled. “Snoozles remembers I’m the greatest earthbender in the world. The rest of you forget it too easily.” As Toph drained the remainder of her water and waited for Katara to give her a refill, she heard the door open and close. It was a nuisance not to be able to feel heartbeats and breathing.  
  
"Honored Lady Beifong! You’re awake!"  
  
Toph would recognize the nervous voice of Zuko’s steward anywhere, but today he seemed genuinely happy to see her. Whatever; she’d return the favor. “Yeah. This healer’s singing could wake the dead.”  
  
Katara scoffed. “My singing is fine.”  
  
The steward didn’t seem to know what to make of that. “How can I serve you, Honored Lady? Master Katara?”  
  
"Tell the Firelord that Lady Beifong is awake, but still weak." Katara was clearly enjoying herself.  
  
"You tell him that I’m awake and strong enough to kick his ass!" Toph said, pointing at the little man. Or the source of his voice, at least; she couldn’t really tell where he was standing. And come to think of it, he was bigger than she was.  
  
"Of course, honored ladies." She felt the gentle whoosh of air as he bowed to each of them in turn, then he left.  
  
For a few blessed minutes, there was quiet, and after shifting her weight and feeling the blood flow back into her extremities, Toph was appreciating the comfort of lying down.  
  
"I didn’t want to say anything," Katara said softly, "but he really loves you."  
  
Toph sighed. “I don't need to have my feet on the ground to tell when you're lying, sweetness. You were dying to say something. Look, he’s a very lonely man and I came to visit him.”  
  
"No." Her friend leaned closer to speak more quietly. "It's not just that. His feelings are real, Toph. And I know you wouldn’t stick around out of pity, so yours must be real, too."  
  
Silence.  
  
"Am I wrong?” Katara pressured.  
  
Toph lifted one hand to her forehead and said nothing, and that was enough of an answer for Katara to lean back in her chair with a smug smile.

"Help me put on my normal clothes before he gets here, at least," Toph growled.

There was a screen for privacy in the corner, but getting there was a problem. As soon as her toes touched the ground, pain followed the path from the ground to her mind, and she jerked her foot back onto the bed.

"Aang said this might happen," Katara said apologetically. "Try to block the flow of chi before it gets to your body."

"What the fuck does that even mean?" Toph snarled.

Katara shrugged. Toph decided to ignore it, because there was no way Katara could have known Toph would hear the rustle of fabric and deduce that she'd shrugged. All of this gesturing to a blind person was massively rude, in her book.

As much as Aang's flowery spiritual understanding of bending irritated her, Toph could piece together what he really meant. The flow of power, from bender to element and vice versa, was something many people had to consciously abet through their forms and breathing. For Toph, who had learned bending as an extension of her body, the experience was different. She was constantly communicating with the earth to see; everything she did passively drew on the earth's power.

Stopping that connection was a pain in the ass.

She had to focus as hard on not earthbending as a novice had to focus on bending; she breathed deeply and centered herself, extending her foot out into a stable earthbending stance. Ironically, it worked; there was no pain. She could feel Katara's confused stare as she stood shakily, but she knew better than to ask Toph about it right now, or, worse, gush over her unique bending style. Ugh.

"Do you need some help?"

"No, you pervert. Go look at your own tits."

A sigh from Katara. Apparently, she just didn't appreciate a perfect joke when she heard it.

It was slow going, changing into normal clothes by feel alone, and Toph was dismayed to find they didn't fit quite right. A week in bed, even with with Katara force-feeding her body what it needed, had weakened her considerably, and her arms and legs felt like cold, brittle twigs.

"I always alter them so they fit just right," she bitched to Katara through the privacy screen, tying on her belt. "And now they're baggy, but if I take them in, what happens when I get back to normal?"

"Just get some new clothes while you recover," Katara said. "I'm sure there're at least a hundred tailors working for people in the palace alone. Hire one of them."

"I'm not made of money!"

"Uh, you kind of are."

Toph snorted.

She barely had time to climb back into bed and chug down another cup of water ("Not so fast!" Katara chided. "You'll make yourself sick!") before the door opened again. It turned out that she didn't need her seismic sense to know when Zuko was near; she knew the sound of him, the rhythm of his step and his breath, and that made her smile. Someone else came with him, but she didn't really care.

"You finally made it over here, Sparky."

"And you finally made it back to me." Zuko was not as good at hiding the emotion in his voice. He never had been.

"Yeah," she said softly. "I think we both know that no matter what happens, I'm always going to come back to you."

"Will you?" She felt the bed shift under his weight as he sat on the edge brushing stray hairs away from her face.

"I never say anything I don't mean."

"Then will you marry me? No, wait, I didn't mean to ask like that! I had it all planned out. It was going to be--"

Toph was already laughing. "For fuck's sake, Sparky. When are you going to get used to the fact that nothing in our lives is ever going to go as planned?" She reached for him, her fingers brushing against the cloth of his sleeve and tugging him down towards her.

He barely seemed to notice. She must really be weak; usually she could push him around without a problem. "Does that mean--"

"I've got conditions," she said, "but yes, I guess I'd love to marry you. Now shut up and kiss me."

"Firelord," the steward stammered, "a-a-are you--"

But it was hard to hear him over Katara's squeal.

 

\-----

 

They swore them both to silence and kicked them out with orders to find food.

"I don't trust Katara as far as I can throw her, you know," Toph said.

"She knows it's a delicate situation." Zuko's callused fingers grazed over her face, as if he was the blind one. "I can't believe you said yes. I can't believe I asked."

"Eh, there's no use resisting it," she said with a careless grin, covering his hand with hers.

"You're skin and bones," he murmured, pained.

"I'll recover." It was her bending that worried her, not her body, but this wasn't the time for her confidence to falter. It would come back.

His hands cupped her face, and she knew he was leaning of her because a few strands of his hair brushed her ear. "What are your conditions?"

She turned her head to kiss one of his palms. It was thrilling to finally, finally get him alone, but she was weak, and when her heart started pounding it made her shake. "First, I understand that I'm going to adopt a lot of Fire Nation traditions, but you've got to understand that I won't be a normal Firelady. From what I heard, they mostly sit around, look pretty, and have kids. I mean, I've got not issue with the second two, but I'm not going to sit around. For one thing, I love vigilante justice."

"I know who you are, Toph. You're a natural leader and you almost laid down your life to save this city. That's the kind of Firelady this nation deserves. Besides," he reasoned, "your justice wouldn't be vigilante if you're the queen. It'd just be justice."

"There's a scary thought," she said.

He did his little pathetic Zuko half-laugh. "What else do you want?"

"Before we get married, I need to go do a few things, quietly, no questions. Alone."

"Things?"

"Old business," she said shortly. "And a little new business. I said no questions."

"Of course." He paused, and she could practically hear the demanding questions he was holding back. "At least take a small escort detail with you."

"No way. I've always travelled alone."

"But as the future Firelady--"

"I'll think about it," she interrupted, waving a hand dismissively. Even that took too much effort, and she was starting to realize just how hungry she was. "Third, and final condition, and I know I'm going to regret this: I want a seat on your council. I own like a quarter of Yu Dao, after all."

His hands stilled on her face; she could feel his surprise. "Really? You could have had that whenever. I never thought you cared."

"Yeah, I know, but I didn't feel like asking until now."

"Done. Anything else?"

"Nah. Those are the big ones."

"I have a few conditions, too," Zuko said. His caution was almost palpable. "You need to take the healers' instructions seriously and really recover before you leave. Katara thinks it'll be a few weeks."

"For fuck's sake," Toph muttered.

"And," he went on, "I came up with an idea while you were sleeping, and I want to try it out. As long as you're recovering, I'm going to teach you to read."

"For fuck's sake! I'm blind!"

"I took that into consideration," he promised. "Deal?"

If she kept caving instead of telling him to fuck off, love was going to be a hassle. "Deal. Let's kiss on it."

"Fine, but no groping me this time," he said. "You're still too weak."


	7. Recovering

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like this chapter was all over the place and way too fluffy. Sorry/enjoy, depending on your taste.

It was irritating not to be able to do anything, but at the same time, it was nice not to have to do anything.

Katara brought food and Iroh, they all ate together, and Toph fell asleep in the middle of lively conversation. When she woke up she was in her usual room, not the medical wing anymore. She knew without being told that Zuko had carried her there. She almost wished she’d stayed awake for that.

"Sugar Queen?" she grumbled. It took too much out of her to roll over or even breathe too deeply.

"You’re up?" Katara asked brightly. "Oh, good. I’ll have them bring up some food. It sure is nice having servants around."

"I guess," Toph said cautiously. Katara was way too fucking cheerful for her liking. "Why are you so chipper?"

"You’re doing really well, actually. You’re going to need to sleep a lot, but you’re already a lot stronger."

"Great." She carefully flexed one knee. It popped, but she was able to prop her foot up on the other knee and pick her toes. Oh, that was a glorious feeling! It had been too long. "What else is going on?"

"Um, Aang and Sokka are on their way back. Oh, and Zuko is having a council meeting tomorrow. Iroh can’t wait, beause he’s been dying to celebrate and he has to keep it quiet until the announcement is official."

"You know," Toph said thoughtfully, "I’m beginning to think that Iroh actually planned this whole thing. He invited me here for the stupid unity banquet, but he told me to come way early, and he kept trying to make Zuko and I run into each other."

"He’s pretty good at matchmaking, then," Katara smiled. "I never thought you’d let yourself be tied down anywhere, much less in a palace."

Toph snorted.

Katara stuck around until she’d eaten and kept everything down, and then she went to rest. As much as Toph hated to admit it, she’d have to thank Katara one of these days for her dogged devotion to keeping the earthquake victims alive, including herself.

She slept again, but only for a couple of hours. The next time she awoke, it was to a gentle hand on her shoulder. She blinked the dryness from her eyes and shifted. “Sparky?”

"It’s me." Even when his voice was hushed, it had that rough, throaty edge to it that she loved. "It’s pretty late. I had a lot of work to do today. Do you wanna go back to sleep?"

"No way. I had to nearly die to get everyone to leave us alone together. I’ve earned this."

She started to move herself over, but his arms slid beneath her legs and shoulders and he took her spot on the bed, leaning his back against the headboard as he held her in his lap.

"Wow," she breathed. Her head rested comfortably against his shoulder, her nose at the perfect height to nuzzle into his neck if she lifted it a little. When she did, she could smell a faint hint of his sweat. She’d caught his unique scent before, when they sparred and their bodies passed closely, but now she could freely admit that it flat-out turned her on. "I really love the way you smell."

"I smell?" He frowned.

"In a good way. Ugh, I think I always liked it. Not during the war, I guess, I never noticed, but afterwards, when we'd have those reunions and we'd both be on Appa."

"I thought you were holding onto me because you hate flying."

"I do hate flying!" She smiled. "But Aang put handles on Appa's saddle for me. Holding onto you was just for fun."

He leaned forward, drawing her tighter and higher against his body, and brushed his lips against hers.

She tilted her head up and kissed him harder.

She had expected him to lean back and break away, trying to keep his distance, as usual; but to her surprise, he groaned against her mouth, a low, throaty sound that made her heart pound and sent shivers down her spine. She wrapped her arms around his neck, and he ran his tongue along her upper lip slowly. 

And then he seemed to realize what was happening and pull back, breathing so hard that his chest pushed against her each time he inhaled.

"Wow," she said again.

"Yeah," he breathed. "Let's take it a little slower."

"Ugh." Too bad she didn't have the energy to protest.

They relaxed in companionable silence for a little while. Toph firmly believed that if you couldn't be comfortably silent with someone, they weren't worth your time. The fact that there was now an overwhelming sexual tension between them was merely an added dimension to their time together, one that she had seen coming at a distance. They were both fiery and passionate. It was only a matter of time before it came to this.

In fact, it probably would have come to this a lot sooner if Zuko hadn't developed ironclad self-control over the past few years. He probably didn't even notice how tightly he held himself in check. Anything that would indulge his desire or excitement or temper was given the cold shoulder. The firelord's cold shoulder! There was a knee-slapper.

Toph, on the other hand, didn't believe in depriving herself of fun. If she'd ever found anyone she could tolerate before Zuko, she wouldn't have hesitated. There'd been a couple of guys she'd been interested in, but at the end of the day, she found them way too annoying to get serious. Satoru sprang to mind. He was sweet and clever, no doubt, and she didn't mind helping him out with the factory, but he never shut the fuck up. And really, if a guy was too sweet, she didn't think she could subject them to the full strength of her playful scorn, and wouldn't that be a dull relationship?

"Are you ready to read?" Zuko asked.

Toph groaned. "You really want to kill the mood, don't you?"

He exhaled against her hair. It passed for a laugh, she supposed. "Whenever you're away, I want to be able to send letters for you, only you, to read."

"So is this some kind of code? Sounds like a harebrained Sokka idea."

"Sort of. And he did help me a little." Zuko leaned over, and she heard the rustle of thick parchment. His hand closed over hers, and he directed her fingers to a cluster of raised lines. "I was going to write out the same characters I paint with ink, but they're small and complex. Sokka pointed out that it'd take a long time for you to pick out the details of each one, so we switched to this."

Toph was a quick learner, even when she was a reluctant student, and even when Zuko's body was pressed against hers, distracting her from her lesson. He guided her through reading the few short pages, some children's story from the Fire Nation.

He left after that, but he came back the next night, and the next, and as she gained strength she found herself reading with greater ease. Reading! Five days later he gave her a pile of notes on Fire Nation history, and she was so bored she worked through them in two nights. After that, he gave her a transcribed book on wedding customs.

She was nearly well enough to begin to walk about on her own by then, and just in time. A week and a half after she woke up, she asked Katara to help her get ready. The next day was Zuko's first council meeting since the earthquake, and she fully intended to be there to defend herself and Zuko against a roomful of angry Fire Nation nobles for the first time. Probably not the last.


	8. Official

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> __
> 
> It took me a long time to finish this chapter because quite frankly, I don't like it. It's a segue that's necessary before the next plot arc. So, sorry. The next part will be smutty, and after that it will split into dual adventures, so you guys can look forward to that!

Suki stopped by the next morning.

"Where were you, anyway?" Toph asked Suki, doing a little bit of stretching in her room. Bending still gave her a fierce headache, so she’d bullied a servant into bringing her a staff to walk with, though she’d pretend it was for fighting and not ensuring she didn’t walk into a wall. "I haven’t seen you since I yelled at you just before the earthquake."

"I went with Aang and Sokka," she said. Toph could tell from her voice that she was leaning back against the wall with her arms crossed and one leg propped on the other, but that’s only because she’d sensed that pose and that tone of voice together so many times from Suki. It was nice to be able to see through memory, if no other way.

"Oh, that makes sense. So they’re back, too?"

"They just got in a few minutes ago," Suki explained. "Appa is exhausted, so I think they’re taking care of him first."

"And then Twinkletoes and Sugar Queen will need a few minutes together," she calculated. "I guess I’ve got no right to roll my eyes at that anymore."

"You don’t," Suki said, smug.

"Did you tell them?" Toph asked, narrowing her eyes in Suki’s direction.

"What, about your dates? There wasn’t really time, and I couldn’t mention you without the two boys getting mopey. I swear, men have no faith. Katara and I never doubted you’d be fine."

Toph laughed. “Zuko was a fucking mess. I guess it was pretty sweet,” she said doubtfully. She wasn’t an expert on sweet; that was more Katara’s expertise. “Anyway, I’m glad you’re back. After I fight it out with the council today Iroh wants to throw a big stupid party and it’ll be a lot better with the old gang. You know, people who don’t have huge sticks up their asses. Plus, I need your help with meeting a few competent soldiers, but we can worry about that later.”

"Soldiers? What are you planning? Does Zuko know about this?"

"It was his idea," Toph said dismissively, straightening up. Her body had stiffened up as well as atrophying while she recovered, and it would take a while to get backc on track. She reached for her staff. "Anyway, let’s worry about that later, I’ve gotta—"

"SIFU BLIND-O!" someone shouted.

It took Toph a moment to realize that it was both Aang and Sokka shouting at once, their shrill male voices blending into one greeting. Sokka slapped her on the back and Aang probably bowed, judging by the rush of air and the angle of his voice.

"I hope you assholes didn’t hold Suki back too much, out there," Toph said. "What’s the situation along the coast?"

"There was a lot of damage," Aang answered seriously. "We were able to barricade a few larger cities, and rebuild some of the smaller villages, but we couldn’t get to all of them in time."

"Of course," Toph said. "Well, Zuko is sending out a lot of his standing army to help with the rebuilding, so at least there’s a silver lining to this disaster. Without a standing army there’s less noise about invasion and Fire Nation superiority. Hopefully. I guess I’ll find out today."

"What’s happening today?" asked Sokka. "Katara said she had to go talk to Iroh about something, but she didn’t say what."

"Oh, a council meeting I’m going to, then a party," Toph shrugged. Who knew which part Katara was preparing for? Knowing her, it could be either. "Are you going to the meeting?" she asked, turning in Aang’s direction.

"If it’s internal Fire Nation affairs, then no," said Aang, from an entirely different direction than she expected. Why did they have to move around so much? "I don’t think it’s right, unless Zuko needs me there. Why are you going?"

"How much of Yu Dao do I own?" she reminded him, frowning.

"Oh, right," he said. Judging by his tone, he was about to sheepishly scratch his bald head—and there was the sound.

"Anyway, you guys have got to come to the party, or I’ll die. Plus, Iroh’s hosting, so he won’t take no for an answer."

"Sure," said Sokka, whose voice was now just beside Suki’s. Toph knew Suki wouldn’t move around much.

"Um," said Aang.

"What?"

"Since when do you go to parties?" he asked, as politely as possible.

"Are you going to make me say it out loud?" Toph asked, irritated. "Fuck’s sake. Fine. Zuko and I are getting married."

"Um," said Aang, again.

"WHAT."

"When did this happen?" Sokka jumped in. "No, how did it happen?" He ticked off possibilities on his fingers. "You don’t care about money, so he couldn’t have paid you to do it. You dont’ care about fame, so…um, yeah, what is it?"

"Ugh, don’t make me say it." Toph sank into a chair, rubbing her eyes with the heels of her palms.

"Holy shit," said Sokka.

"Aw, Sifu Toph is in love!" said Aang. "I knew it."

"If you want details, you’re going to have to ask him," she replied dryly. "I refuse to share that kind of information with you morons."

"So the party is for your engagement," said Suki. "That explains why Iroh is so happy."

"I’m pretty sure he set us up, but I didn’t realize it until I was already engaged," Toph admitted.

"That sounds like him," said Sokka.

"So when’s the big day?" said Aang.

"Not for a while. I have things to do first."

She could feel them all looking at each other, confused. “Okay, everyone out,” Toph snapped, making scooting motions with her hands. “I’ve gotta get changed for this stupid meeting. Tailor’s showing up in a little while. Fuck off. I’ll see you all tonight.”

Her friends weren’t great at taking hints. She had to physically shove them out of the room.

—-

"We’ll throw you a crazy bachelor party," said Sokka, perched on the edge of the Firelord’s desk.

"Tasteful," Aang interrupted his brother-in-law. "We can have a band playing traditional fire nation songs!"

"With traditional fire nation dancing girls," Sokka added. "And booze!"

"Sokka," Zuko said, tired. "You knocked half my papers to the ground, and Aang—you’re standing on them. I’m glad to see you’re back, but this council meeting is very important, so if you’d just let me—"

"Oh, you’ve had plenty of time to prepare," said Sokka, spreading his arms wide. "You probably live in this closet with your papers, don’t you?"

Zuko didn’t want to admit to that. “No.” His voice was sullen, even to his own ears.

"If you can’t take joy in a wedding, then you’re definitely out of balance," said Aang.

"Are you trying to play the Avatar card to get me to ignore my work?"

Aang shrugged, half-grinning. “Maybe.”

Zuko put down his pen, not that that meant anything when his papers were scattered all over the room. “That’s not going to work.”

"I’ll transcribe more things for Toph," Sokka offered. "Whatever you want. I’m pretty fast now. Just let’s have a fun party for the guys after this meeting and stuff."

Zuko considered that for a moment. “How about a road trip instead of a party? There’s somewhere I’ve been meaning to go, and once Toph leaves, I’ll be free.” He paused. “I don’t want her to go alone, either, so maybe Katara could go with her. Suki would have to be here guarding Uncle, of course,” he added apologetically.

Sokka shrugged. “What can I say? She loves her work. Not a big fan of travelling. Ha! Big fan.”

Aang made a face. Zuko rolled his eyes.

"A trip sounds good," Sokka finally admitted. "Are you going to tell us where?"

"Nah," said Zuko. "But I’ll give you a hint: Aang and I have been there. You haven’t."

—-

Toph had never really cared about how she looked. When she was a kid, she’d rather enjoyed being filthy and ripping up the nice things her parents gave her, a not-so-passive rebellion against rules and refinement and being treated as a breakable object.

But she also hated doing things by halves.

"I’ll borrow something for today," she told the tailor, sitting in her chair and rolling her walking stick between her palms. "Extremely formal. I’m attending the council meeting."

The older woman, whose name was Kiyo, made a humming sound as her pen scratched across paper, making notes.

"Take my measurements now. I’ll be gone for a few weeks, but when I get back, I would like two or three sets of clothing appropriate for travel or combat, similar to what I’m wearing, but in fire nation colors and style. Make it as fashion-forward as you can without impeding movement. The Firelord’s steward will give you the exact date I need these things ready."

"Very good, Lady Beifong," the woman murmured.

"I heard you’re very creative," Toph said offhandedly. She’d asked a few of the soldiers who designed their commanding officers’ wardrobe. "Don’t hold back. I’ll pay you well."

—-

Zuko had delayed this meeting for two weeks while Toph recovered, attending to pressing matters that followed the earthquake before he gathered up all of the talking heads of the nation to yell at him about his latest questionable decision. He didn’t want to argue about marrying Toph without her present. She’d hate that.

Sitting cross-legged on the Firelord’s traditional pedestal, his uncle at his right hand, he almost didn’t recognize her when she walked into the room surrounded by elderly nobles. In demure, formal robes in deep red and rust, with her hair hanging down to her waist and braided back from her face, she looked like a different woman. She appeared so delicate, he almost laughed. She was the least delicate person he knew, both in spirit and in combat, but she certainly knew how to play the part. Her beauty and her grace made his heart swell with pride.

He didn’t realize he was staring at her, dreamy-eyed, until his uncle poked his arm. He blinked, and realized that the avatar’s entire gang had lined up along the back of the room to watch. Assholes.

He cleared his throat, and the nobles turned toward him attentively.

"Today’s meeting will be short. I know we’re all in the midst of rebuilding and regrouping, and for now, that is the most important thing for us to do as the wardens of our nation." He met each of his council’s eyes, and glanced out at the gallery full of lesser nobles, as well, hoping each understood how pivotal their reaction to the quake would be. "I have summoned you today to honor the earthbender Toph Beifong, who saved countless lives and changed our geography on the day of the disaster. I have asked Lady Beifong to marry me, and she has accepted."

He waited.

"An earthbender cannot be your wife, Firelord," General Verai stammered. "What if your heir was an earthbender? It is unthinkable. The Firelord has always been a firebender."

"The Beifong family supported Ba Sing Se against both of our seiges," Lord Hashi rumbled.

"They supported us, too," said Lady Li. "They’re duplicitous. And there isn’t even a daughter in their family. I’ve never heard of one."

"Have any of you met this young lady?" General Shurai interjected. "She saved the city, and the people out on the streets love her."

"When did you meet her?" Lord Hashi asked gruffly.

"I helped train her students, weeks ago. This is the same woman who singlehandedly invented metalbending. If any earthbender is worthy of our Firelord, Toph Beifong is the one."

"What about Lady Mai?" said one fat old man whose name Zuko always forgot. "She came from a good, loyal family. The daughter of the governor of New Ozai, wasn’t she?"

"She’s married," Lady Li informed him. "And there haven’t been any steady prospects since. Let’s face the fact that our Firelord needs an heir."

Zuko didn’t like the direction this was going in. “Enough.” He stood up. “The decision is made, and it’s a suitable reward for the lady who saved our city.” He almost gestured at the gallery, and then realized he would have made an idiot of himself in front of half the nobles of his kingdom. She was blind, she couldn’t see his stupid hand movements. He stepped down from the dais and went to her, people parting and bowing before him as he passed. He extended his hand to her and drew her beside him.

She didn’t say a word, and carried herself with such natural poise that he almost thought he’d grabbed the wrong woman out of the crowd. But no; those eyes, that hint of a sardonic smile, the rebellious set of her jaw as she walked into certain disapproval. He guided her carefully up the dias, and she took her place beside him, opposite Iroh. When she sat down, her dress folded perfectly and symmetrically under her. How did she do that?

"The wedding will be in six months’ time," he said evenly. "That is plenty of time to allow for recovery and reconstruction in the city, as well as travel and planning. Any question of earthbenders inheriting will be addressed as it arises." It may never be a problem, he thought to himself. "We are entering a new age as a nation. This era will be defined by cooperation and progress, not brute force. This marriage is a symbol of cooperation. It is also a love match." He met the gazes of everyone around the table evenly, just waiting for someone to challenge him. Come on, he begged them with his eyes. Say something. Just try it.

His anger remained unleashed, tightly controlled, like a storm in his belly. He parted his lips to exhale, and his breath was unnaturally hot, though there was no flame. The silence extended, and to his surprise, no one said a thing. Not even Toph.

But if he thought she’d stay silent for long, he was wrong. They moved on, with little trouble, to the issue of the roads leading into and out of the city. They were backed up for miles in both directions.

"I feel partly responsible for that," Toph interjected. "But now that I know it’s a problem, the Avatar and I can fix it in the next few days."

No one knew how to react to her speaking. Luckily, Iroh helped out.

"How long will it take?" he asked.

"Best guess, a day or two of solid work," she answered easily. "I suggest we get some of the engineers in the military to design pulley systems to bring cargo up to the city, as well. That slows down traffic."

"My son is head of the design corps," said General Shurai. "I can tell him to bring you some plans."

"Have them sent to the Firelord," Toph said.

Zuko was impressed that she didn’t make a joke about being blind. She could have gotten in a good one if she’d wanted to, though.

She seemed to have a clever suggestion for everything, and slowly the council relaxed a little. Zuko expected some nasty tactics from them, especially since some of them had daughters around his age, but for now, at least, there was a tentative acceptance. It was happening. He was getting married.


	9. Toph Finally Gets Laid

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> AWKWARD BANGING

With her walking stick and limited bending, it was much more difficult to slip out of the party unnoticed than it had been weeks ago, the night all of this had started. Being the guest of honor this time didn't help. Luckily, this particular room was open along one wall, an architectural quirk that only worked in temperate regions like the Fire Nation coast. Archways led out onto a balcony overlooking the garden. In afternoons, it probably made a nice sitting area, but right now it was cold and windy and empty, exactly the sort of place Toph wanted to be when the social force of a crowd was bearing down on her. Behind her, Sokka and Aang were laughing at something while Katara struggled to be the calm, responsible one. She could pick their voices out of the throng, and she was delighted that they were happy; she just didn't want to be in the middle of it, completely blind and useless, made vulnerable by the nationwide announcement that she was in love. She leaned on the railing and breathed deeply.

"There you are. After today, I thought you'd left me for good."

She could hear the fear in his voice, below the joke. She lowered her head and smiled, not that he'd be able to see it, standing behind her and a distance away. "I thought you were going to burn down the war room," she said.

"Me too." He came to stand beside her, his palms flat on the railing she leaned on.

"You wearing formal clothes, Sparky?"

He didn't answer for a moment, confused. "Yes. Why?"

She turned towards him, cupping the burned side of his face. He leaned into her palm, his breath warm on her skin, and she smiled. With her other hand she reached up, lightly touching the golden headpiece of the Firelord, which was held in his topknot with a pin. Beyond that, his hair flowed freely to just below his shoulders, silky and long.

"Toph," he said softly.

"Hm?" Her fingers explored the stiff collar of his armored mantle. The Firelord's formal wear was also his war regalia.

"I was wondering if you'd like…that is, before you go, if you'd…like to visit my room."

"I've been there before." Was he asking what she thought? She hoped so. She was so eager for it, but she was also afraid of scaring him off. Coming on too strong was her thing, and Zuko was a shy little princess of a man.

"I mean, if you'd like to you could spend the night there. With me. Together."

She touched his face again, felt his warm cheeks. "Are you blushing?" she grinned.

"I'm not good at this," he protested.

"Is that how you present yourself to girls? 'I'm not good at this?' No wonder there were 'no other prospects,'" she teased.

"Toph," he said, strained.

She leaned closer to him, standing on her tiptoes. "I'd love to," she whispered. "Do you think we can get out without anyone noticing?"

His weight shifted, presumably as he looked around. "Yeah," he whispered back. "If we go right now."

She grabbed his hand and he pulled her away, as quickly as he could. The guard was light and silent that night. He might have warned them ahead of time not to interfere, she thought, or they just might never question the Firelord. After hearing some of the tales of Ozai, she suspected the latter. She didn't consider that the guards could see that they were both young and excited and in love, and they elbowed each other and smirked and never considered stopping them.

In his room it was cold; no one had heated it for him. No one had expected him back so quickly. It was a little silly to heat a room for the Firelord, anyway; he could probably handle starting a fire with his own hands once in a while, Toph thought wryly.

He closed the door behind her and bent down, cradling her face in those same callused hands. "A-are you sure you want to do this right now?" he stammered, a little out of breath. "I know you can't bend."

She smoothed back his hair, loving the feel of it sliding through her fingers. "Look, I may be a virgin, but even I know that bending isn't a requirement."

"You're a virgin?" His voice was strained, trembling.

"Oh, come on, Sparky," she laughed. "Don't rub it in! It's not that I haven't wanted to have sex, I just never found a guy that was tolerable before." She traced the burned side of his face with her fingertips. "And now, I really, really want to have sex." For fuck's sake, was he blushing again?

"M-me too. I mean, I've done it before, but I really...I, uh...I want to..."

She was laughing again by then. "Really want to nail me? Sweet! Stop with the blushing. Here, look." She bit back her grin and straightened up, directing her eyes to where she guessed his were. "It's simple. We're two adults, and as a bonus, we're in love. Clearly you should just do really badly on purpose and set my standards nice and low," she teased.

With her hands on his face, she could feel him smile and relax.

"Out of curiosity, how did you keep yourself from sounding like a dork long enough to get laid in the past?"

"I mostly stayed quiet," he admitted, "until we got started."

She tried not to laugh again, but it escaped as a graceless snort. "You're going to have to be vocal with me, or I won't be able to tell what's going on."

"I know," he said softly.

Drawing her fingers down his cheekbones, she had him bend down until her lips could reach his. To her surprise, none of his awkwardness translated to his kissing; it was fluid, deep, and passionate, exactly what she wanted at that moment, as if he somehow knew. His hands slid down her sides and rested on her hips for a long moment before they broke the kiss, breathing hard.

"Wanna see something nice about these formal dresses?" he said, his voice so low and rough that it drove his earlier stammering out of Toph's mind. His hand slipped between two overlapping lengths of cloth at her waist, reaching for a cord that was wound between all of the layered garments, tacked to some with a few stitches. He pulled it and all of it fell neatly off.

"What the hell!" Toph laughed, clutching them to her chest. "Why didn't they show me that sooner? It was impossible to change in or out of these things myself."

She heard the quiet exhalation that passed for a laugh with him. "My clothes don't do that, by the way." He touched her bare shoulder. She could feel his breath, warmer and more forceful than it was before. "I need to get rid of most them myself." He bent down and kissed her shoulder, the same place he'd just touched, and it sent a warm shiver down her spine. "Wait for me?"

"What else am I going to do with all my clothes falling off? Go for a jog?"

"I guess you're stuck here." She could hear the smile in his voice as he guided her to a low couch along the wall, then stepped away. It was comfortable, covered in some kind of plush, warm cloth, so she reclined on it as she listened to him get settled. She heard the rustle of heavy fabric, the dull, hollow thud of armored pieces being hung on a rack. She heard a footstool being knocked into, and a muffled curse, which made her grin again.

"You need to redesign the Firelord's armor," she said. "I suggest backing everything with a nice bendable metal."

"I'll think on it," he waved, missing her point completely.

When he returned, he sat on the edge of the couch and leaned over her, brushing his lips across her forehead, her nose, her mouth. She could feel his hair, shaken loose from the crown and topknot, curtaining them both as her lips met his again and again. When his mouth traveled lower, lavishing her jaw and her neck with attention, his hair followed, trailing lightly over her skin, heightening the sensation.

"Are you doing that on purpose?" she breathed.

He didn't answer, but gently pulled the layers of cloth away from her body, one by one, and left them on the floor beside the couch. It was a strange sensation to have her naked body slowly unveiled in front of him, knowing he was drinking in her form with his eyes, something she would never be able to reciprocate. She could feel his ragged breathing, his racing heartbeat, and knew he liked what he saw.

"You're going to slap me for saying this," he whispered, "but you are perfect. You look like a graceful, delicate noblewoman, but I know you're strong, probably stronger than me. I'm not afraid I'll break you."

Some strange mixture of arousal and rebellion rose up within her, wanting him to go ahead and try. "I'm not going to slap you for that," she whispered back, propping herself up on her elbows. "I love to hear you say it."

She raised one hand to his shoulder and trailed it down his bare chest. How much of his clothing had he taken off? There was cloth at his waist, to her disappointment; he'd left his pants on. His body was lean and powerful, the product of years of rigorous training. As her fingers rode the contours of his muscles, she let her mind wander back to the times she'd trained with him, or even been present when he was training with someone else. The heat of his body, the precision of every movement he made, the scent of his sweat. What was he thinking? Did he have similar memories of her?

There was no time to ask; he cupped her face with one hand and kissed her, the other hand tracing her collarbone and the upper swell of her breast. She inhaled sharply when his fingers ran over her nipples and still lower, his touch light as a feather, teasing. His thumb ran in circles over her clit, slowly, in time with their kiss. She was beyond ready when he finally slid a finger inside her, the slight pinching pain nothing more than a momentary distraction from the pleasure.

"Was that okay?" he whispered against her lips.

"Yeah," she whispered back eagerly. "Yes. More."

He breathed his subtle laugh. "Fine, on one condition."

"Mm?" She combined a moan with an acknowledgement.

"Don't call me any nicknames when we're having sex." A second finger expertly joined the first. "Just call me Zuko."

It felt twice as good, which made sense when she thought about it. "You got something against 'Sparky?'" she grinned, out of breath.

"No." His voice was low and rough again; the bastard probably knew she couldn't refuse him when he spoke like that. "I just love hearing you say my real name. To me. When we're alone."

"Zuko," she breathed, arching her back and pressing her hips into his hand.

She was too wrapped up in her own pleasure to notice when his weight shifted; suddenly, he was leaning down between her legs, his tongue replacing his thumb on her clit. She gently gripped his hair, the fine strands slipping between her fingers as her hands shook.

This was about a million times better than taking care of things by herself, she decided. That was the last coherent thought she had for a long time. She could hardly tell where he ended and she began; there was only the glorious pleasure, growing and mounting. When she finally climaxed with a shout, she had to grip the couch white-knuckled, afraid she was going to somehow fling herself right off of it.

Zuko pulled back, laughing. "You okay?"

"I think so," she panted. "Holy shit."

"Calm down," he teased, wiping sweaty strands of hair away from her face. She loved that little gesture, knowing he wanted to see the euphoria in her eyes, even though she couldn't see him. "We've got the whole night ahead of us. You know, maybe I can convince you not to leave at all."

"Nah, you can't. But I'm gonna let you try." Grinning, she pulled him down on top of her, and they began again.


	10. Emolord Zuko

When he woke up in the morning, she was gone.

Zuko wasn’t surprised. In fact, he’d expected it. He knew, in the core of his soul, that she had not only left his bed, but she had left the city.

That didn’t make her abandonment any less painful. He ignored the chill that ran through his body from head to toe, making him huddle under the covers like a child.  _She’ll come back. She’ll be safe. She said she would._

She would always do this, always need her freedom from him. He knew that. She wasn’t like him; she didn’t feel the chains of responsibility binding her to one place. She’d thrown off those shackles when she was still a child, and no one would ever chain her again, not even him, not even their love. He would have to learn to live with it.

But how long would she be content to return? For anyone else, the promise of being a queen might be attractive enough to stay. Even Zuko himself might be attractive enough to make her stay. But Toph was blind, and she’d always been a queen in her own way. She didn’t need him. Not the way he needed her.

With a deep sigh, he kicked off the blankets and got dressed. His steward showed up a few minutes later, summoned by the guards outside who had heard the Firelord stirring, and Zuko sent him to ask the Kyoshi Warriors and his generals who, exactly, Toph had taken with her. She’d probably consulted with one of them.

Suki, Sokka, and Aang were there minutes later. Zuko hadn’t expected them so soon; he sat cross-legged in front of his meditation candles, trying to find some semblance of inner peace before he dealt with deciding what to do next. He scrambled up when he heard the door open, but his muscles protested, and he had to grab a table for balance. It had been a strenuous night.

Aang sauntered in first. “I thought Toph was still with you,” he said, leaning against a bedpost and surveying the tousled sheets. The grin on his face was catlike.

“Well, she’s not.” Zuko didn’t sound sullen often anymore; he’d long since schooled his voice to calm diplomacy instead of his emotional teenaged outbursts. But apparently his old habits were coming back. “She was supposed to take an escort with her when she left. Did she?” he asked, looking at Suki.

The commander shook her head, her arms crossed behind her back. She was technically on duty right now, after all, even if Sokka was tagging along with her wherever she went. She seemed remarkably alert after staying up late at the party last night. Suki was nothing if not professional. “According to your uncle, she dictated letters to your father, your mother, your sister, and Lady Mai, then she left.”

Zuko ran a shaking hand through his hair. “She can’t bend yet. She’s out there, she’s still weak, and she’s alone.”

“Come on,” Sokka snorted. “This is Toph. She doesn’t need bending to scare the shit out of everyone she meets.”

“So?” Aang gave his brother-in-law a look. “Zuko’s still going to worry.”

“Well, we have a road trip to plan,” Sokka pointed out. “I’m sure Toph will be fine. We should go have some fun.”

“Sokka,” Suki said gently, laying her hand on his arm.

“ _What_?” Sokka’s brow was furrowed. He almost looked like the skinny, unreasonable boy he’d been eight years before. “It’s not like we can do anything.”

Aang stepped forward, the obnoxious, knowing smile he’d worn earlier gone. “Guys, why don’t you go out and check on Appa? We’re not leaving until he’s rested. Zuko and I will figure out what to do now.”

Sokka looked like he was about to protest, but Suki grabbed the back of his shirt and steered him out the door like an unruly child. He’d grown into an effective and creative leader for the Southern Water Tribe, but he could still be a moron from time to time. The door closed behind them with a thud.

“I promised I wouldn’t interfere with this,” Zuko said heavily.

“Do you know where she went?” Aang leaned back against the wall opposite Zuko, crossing his arms over his chest.

“Not really. She said she was taking care of old business, or something. What if she has another…”

Aang gave him a queasy look. “ _Toph_? No offense, but isn’t it kind of a miracle that she has one relationship?”

Zuko laughed, or as close to it as he ever came. “Yeah, I guess. And she was…” He glanced at the bed and then changed his mind. What he’d shared with Toph was too precious to speak about. “…uh, quiet about it. I mean, she didn’t mention anyone.”

“Maybe she went to see Mai, or her school,” said Aang.

“I don’t know. Yeah, maybe.” She sent messenger hawks to her school daily; he doubted she’d go there. “She sent letters to my family and Mai. She wouldn’t send a letter then visit them, too, would she?”

“You could always ask your steward, or whoever she dictated her letters to.”

“That seems rude, Aang.”

Aang shrugged helplessly. “I’m just trying to help!”

Glancing at his candles again, Zuko rubbed his chin. His stubble itched. He hated shaving, but he hated looking like his father even more. “Maybe she went to Gaoling,” he said quietly.

Aang was silent for a moment.

“You think she did,” Zuko guessed.

“Probably.” The Avatar shifted his weight from one foot to the other. “That’s so far away. She’s going to be on a boat for two weeks, at least. She could have just asked for a ride on Appa. What’re you going to do?”

“That’s what’s killing me, Aang. I promised I wouldn’t intefere.” Zuko looked up at his friend, searching for some kind of solace in Aang’s optimistic gray eyes. “But she’s nearly killed herself at least once in the past month.”

“I can’t tell you what to do,” Aang said.

Zuko narrowed his eyes. “What would you do?”

“I don’t know, Zuko. I’ve kept promises and I’ve broken them.”

Zuko remembered the one Aang had broken; the promise to kill him if he became like his father. When he’d stopped the Harmony Restoration Movement, the Avatar had nearly made good on that promise; but then he’d made a judgement call and let Zuko live.

“And Katara doesn’t really do things like that,” Aang went on, breaking the tension of the memory. He rubbed the back of his neck with an uneasy grin. “She’d probably make me go with her, and it’d be really uncomfortable.”

Zuko made an effort to smile. “Ha. That’s true.”

An amicable silence took over for a few moments. Zuko closed his eyes and took a deep breath, feeling the fire in the candles respond to the flow of his chi as his lungs expanded and relaxed.

“I shouldn’t go after her,” Zuko said quietly. “If she’s going to be my wife, I need to trust her judgement.” He opened his eyes.

Aang took a step forward, putting his hand on Zuko’s shoulder. “That had to be pretty tough to decide,” he said.

“Yeah. But it’s right.”

“It is,” the Avatar agreed.

There was another silence, free of tension.

“Let’s go tell Sokka we’re leaving tomorrow,” Zuko said, rising. His legs buzzed with pain as the blood flowed back into them. He’d been sitting still too long. “I bet he’ll be excited."

"Yeah," said Aang. "And the Sun Warriors  _probably_  won't kill us for telling another people they exist.”


	11. Visits

As the first rays of morning light warmed her hands and face, Toph made her way to the prison.

It would have been easier if she was back to full strength with her bending. She could feel out shapes and movement well enough now, and earlier she’d been able to trap her own hand in the earth, over and over again, without tiring out; but she couldn’t do what she wanted to, sinking into the land beneath the capital and bursting out of the ground in the prison like a demented daisy.

The thought made her smile, at least.

The guard at the door was nervous. She could feel it long before they was close enough to speak.

“Uh, my lady?”

“Yeah, it’s me.” Toph put down her hood.

The guard hesitated, unsure of whether she should stand aside.

“Do you want me to go get Iroh before you let me in? Or do you want me to wake up the Firelord?” Toph asked evenly.

“No, my lady, that won’t be necessary,” the guard said quickly, stepping aside.

How far would that threat get her in the Fire Nation? Zuko would probably hate her using him as a threat, and when it came down to it, Toph was probably more dangerous than he was.  _Especially_  in the Fire Nation; they knew how to handle firebenders here, but they weren’t great at fighting earthbenders. But barring fighting, shit, it was fun to drop names.

The high-security cells were in the basement. She felt the uneasy shifting of guards’ feet on the ground as she passed, and beyond them, the restless breathing of Firelord Ozai, the Phoenix King.

The guard let her into the cell without a word, and closed the grated window. Half the cell was barred off, for the safety of visitors, Toph guessed. She knew Zuko had visited often over the years, in some kind of effort to be kind to the father who had despised him.

She didn’t really see the point of that.

“I remember you,” Ozai said.

Toph snorted. “Yeah, one of the little kids who defeated the self-declared king of the world. We’d be pretty hard to forget.”

“Why are you here?” he snapped.

She twirled her staff one-handed, then planted it hard on the ground, the sound echoing almost painfully in the small stone cell. “I’m marrying your son.”

Ozai scoffed. “He’s marrying an  _earthbender_? Oh, I don’t know why I’m surprised. He’s always been weak, and you’re–”

“The greatest earthbender in the world,” Toph interrupted him, grinning. “Trust me, I’m way more surprised than you are that I ended up with  _him_. Now let’s get down to business: you hurt an innocent child, your own son, because you thought he was weak. But you got your ass kicked by the twelve-year-old Avatar, one of the gentlest souls on the planet, while he was still in training–being taught by  _three other children,_ including the son you reviled–so I’m not especially impressed, you know? You’ve hurt everyone close to you, especially your children, but Zuko still wants to treat you well, fuck knows why.”

“Because he knows what’s good for him,” Ozai said. “He was crowned at sixteen. He has no idea how to be the Firelord. He needs me to guide him, and some Ear–”

Toph waved her hand dismisively. “Yeah, yeah, whatever. You don’t like me, I don’t care. I respect what Zuko’s trying to do, even if you’re the biggest douchebag in the Fire Nation and don’t deserve him. I’m just paying a courtesy visit to let you know that Zuko is off-limits. And if you ever attempt to hurt, or manipulate, or fuck up any of  _my_ kids the way you fucked up your own family, I’ll come back and kill you, real slowly. I’m not sure if Zuko would try to stop me, but it doesn’t really matter. It’d happen anyway.”

“The  _Avatar_  couldn’t kill me,” Ozai said, barking out a laugh. “You think you could?”

Toph shrugged, slinging her walking stick on her shoulder and turning towards the door. “Aang couldn’t bring himself to kill another human being,” she conceded. “But don’t worry; I’m not nearly as compassionate as he is.”

—

It took two weeks on dusty old roads to get to Mai’s home. It was at least as big as the palace compound, spread out over acres of countryside. She and her husband (an extremely good looking non-bender, by all reports) ruled over a huge swath of land together, and both her father and her husband’s father sat on Zuko’s council.

Azula had her own wing in the enormous home, not that Toph visited it; both women met her together in a large, probably elaborately furnished sitting room. She could feel Mai lounging in the afternoon heat, but Azula was sitting with her arms crossed, practically motionless. Apparently the whole damned family was made of tightasses.

“I’ll cut to the chase,” Toph said. “I came to make sure there’re no hard feelings. If either of you are pissed, let’s just have it out right now.”

“Zuko and I were over years ago,” Mai said. She had a way of speaking as though she hardly cared whether anyone heard her or not; as if she was just talking to pass the time. “We still write sometimes, but I’m not jealous, if that’s what you’re asking. I’m just glad he’s stopped moping around the Capital and started getting laid again.”

Azula made a disgusted noise. “Please, Mai.”

Mai sighed. “Grow up.”

“What about you?” Toph asked Azula. “I’m not asking for hugs and fucking kisses, I just wanna know you’re not going to show up in ten years trying to kill Zuko or my kids.”

“ _Please_ ,” Azula repeated. “I’m not a child-killer. Well, not since  _I_  was a child.”

Okay, that was kind of funny. Toph snorted.

“I didn’t exactly have a healthy childhood,” Azula went on. Her voice still had a playful lilt to it, but there was something beneath that, the depth of character of someone who has been broken and rebuilt. “I wouldn’t inflict that on another child, especially not a niece or nephew.”

“What about Zuko?” Toph asked, crossing her arms behind her head and leaning back. Mai had some comfortable damned furniture.

“It took us five years to treat each other like humans, let alone siblings,” Azula said. “I’m not especially interested in being manipulated into hating him again. And I’m not especially interested in the crown anymore. Oh, and in case you can’t tell? I look really exasperated right now.”

“Thanks for the info,” Toph said wryly. “You know, I’m kinda disappointed. Either of you could have given me an actual fight, for a change. It’s been a while.”

“Forget it,” said Mai, flipping open a heavily ornamented fan to cool herself off. “I am  _so_  done with the knife act.”

“But we’re bound to spar eventually,” Azula sighed. “You’re not really a member of the family until someone loses their temper and challenges you to an Agni Kai.”

The servant brought in mochi ice cream and they dug in. This was the last place Toph had expected a friendly reception, but here they were.

—

She bought a ticket to Yu Dao at a small port in the south. In clean Fire Nation clothes, with her hair down, no one questioned her business in the ex-colonies.

Deep down, she almost wished someone had stopped her. Going to Yu Dao meant she was practically in the Earth Kingdom, and that meant she was one step closer to seeing her parents, tentatively reunited in their old home.

She wasn’t ready. She knew she’d never be ready.

Before she left, she sent a message to the capital, by messenger hawk.

_Going to Yu Dao. I love you._

There were only three people who could read Toph’s ‘writing,’ so there was no need to sign it, unless Sokka told Zuko he loved him regularly.

She’d told Zuko not to interfere, but now that she was on the verge of seeing her parents again, she didn’t want to be alone. But she didn’t want him to be there, either, to see her weak, to see her speak softly and cry, to see her doubt.

To make matters worse, she hated traveling by ship nearly as much as she hated flying. She spent weeks throwing up into a bucket and emptying it over the side every two hours, like clockwork. It was a good thing she knew for a fact she couldn’t be pregnant; that would have just been the icing on the crap cake of this month.

When they finally got to Yu Dao, it was a clear morning. She dug her feet into the sweet, sweet earth and never wanted to let go. All that time off the ground had done her good; she could see again, see  _everything_. The city was growing fast; her school had been absorbed into its outskirts, and downtown there were buildings that were four or five stories tall. With a stupid grin on her face, she made her way to the market district. Throwing up for weeks really gave a girl an appetite.

Old Shan was still selling meat skewers in his shop, though the corner he was on was a lot busier than it used to be. With a stick of barbequed gullsalmon in hand, she found a bench and settled in to have a relaxing meal with the morning sun warming her face and watch the world go by.

“Read all about it!” a boy shouted, peddling papers to the adults who pushed past. “The Viper Bat Triad takes the north shore! The Earthen Fire Refinery opens new headquarters downtown! Read the Republic Times!”

Viper Bats? Great, a new gang. Before Yu Dao’s governmental system was set up as a republic, some of the old ex-Rough Rhinos had formed a firebending gang. Toph and her students had kicked their asses straight out of town, but she knew it was just a matter of time before someone else set up.

At least Satoru and his uncle were expanding their business. Good for them. They’d bought her dad out years ago.

“The Viper Bat Triad captures a dragon!” the boy went on. “Th–”

What the fuck?

“Hey, kid,” Toph shouted. “Come here.”

He pitter-pattered over. It was strange to think that he was about the age she and Aang had been when they’d fought in the war. He seemed so innocent. “Paper’s two yuans.”

“I’m blind,” she said. “I’ll give you five yuans to tell me what’s going on with the dragon.”

The kid looked both ways before taking her money. Clearly he wasn’t supposed to do this, but he could pocket the five yuans, and he wasn’t about to pass that up. “They say it started when this guy showed up in town a couple weeks ago with a dragon,” the kid said quickly.

“Holy shit,” said Toph. “How big was it?”

“It was almost as big as a person!”

“Dragons are a lot bigger than that. Maybe it was a lizard.”

“No way!” he insisted. “It was a dragon! I saw it breathe fire myself!”

Fuck’s sake. Children. “Okay, kid. Hey, did the guy have blue arrows tattooed on his body?”

She could feel the boy’s glare. “If it was the Avatar, I woulda said it was the Avatar! I know what he looks like! It was just some guy! Anyway, everyone was talking about the dragon, and the guy got really mad because he didn’t want to make a big deal about it, but it was a  _dragon_ , then the Viper Bats nabbed him and no one’s seen him since.”

She suppressed a groan. “Huh, interesting. Thanks.”

Toph tossed him an extra yuan, and he scurried back to his corner. She finished her gullsalmon and chucked the skewer into the trash.

Life could never be easy, could it? It could never give her a fucking break. _I mean, it’s probably not a dragon,_  she thought.  _But I can’t take the chance. And I don’t like the sound of the same gang taking control of the north shore, either._

Well, at least she could put off seeing her parents for a while longer.


	12. Not Sleeping Leads to Stupid Decisions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mild-to-medium smut alert. Category: pathetic wanking

Every time he closed his eyes, ugly thoughts began to roll around in his mind again, the business of the day taking precedence over resting. He avoided mirrors, but he couldn’t ignore his steward telling him his cheeks were hollow, or Aang frowning at the dark circles under his eyes.

Druk’s sleep cycle, two days waking and one sleeping, was going to kill him. Not that he’d trade the experience of bonding with a dragon for the world; when the Sun Warriors told him he was the hatchling’s guardian, and that the little dragon had imprinted on him when he’s touched its egg all those years before, it was one of the most surreal and incredible moments of his life.

But then they’d gotten home, and they had no idea what Druk would eat, or how he was supposed to sleep, or how fast he’d grow. Apparently, all of that varied from dragon to dragon, so they had to figure it out as they went. Worst of all, when the tiny red dragon had finally settled into a sleep cycle, it was the worst possible combination with Zuko’s duties as Firelord.

It felt like he never slept anymore. Even when he got the chance, he  _couldn’t_  sleep. Like now. It was midnight, Druk had settled down for a one-day snooze, and Zuko was staring at his stupid canopy in his stupid bed and he wanted to die a little.

He hadn’t been relaxed since that night with Toph. He closed his eyes on the red-and-gold embroidered canopy, trying to summon up an image of her.

...she was small and bright, her eyes like precious jade, deep and shallow at once, looking straight into your soul. She was nearly always smiling sardonically. Unflappable.

But he remembered her licking her lips nervously, her eyelids fluttering closed. The sound of her moan, hesitant and surprised. Her back had arched and her hips had ground against his hand, and he’d felt shivers run through her body. She was steely and undefeatable anywhere else, but in his bed she was soft and vulnerable, and he loved every moment, loved that she trusted him with this side of herself, loved that he had this effect on her, loved that in bed, she was so gentle and he was so harsh.

He grunted and turned onto his stomach. He didn’t need to have these kinds of thoughts right now. Flipping over was a mistake; his erection was trapped under him at an odd angle now. He reached between the mattress and his abdomen to adjust himself.

With his eyes closed, it could almost be...

No, it really couldn’t. Not with his huge, callused hands and overenthusiasm. He remembered the healers smirking when they told him he’d hyperextended his elbow, back when he was first Firelord, and how much he’d wanted to fucking die at that moment. They knew exactly how he’d gotten that injury, of course. It didn’t help that he’d been irregular with his workouts that first year, and only his right arm had maintained its definition until he evened them back out with balanced training later. He groaned into his pillow at the humiliating memory.

At least Toph was kind enough to let him pretend to be cool once in a while, though he was really the one awed by her. It wasn’t just how terrifying she was, though Zuko was certainly partial to a woman who could beat him in a fight. It wasn’t just her personality, either, though that was what he loved most about her.

...It was that ass. He hadn’t wanted to make her uncomfortable the first time they were together, so he’d been as gentle and patient as he could, focusing completely on her with only his hands and his mouth. But damn, he wanted to slam his hips into that round ass over and over again. Her hair was long and luxurious, plenty long enough to wrap around his hand and pull her back, her body arched away from him. His body would be growing hotter as his passion flowed unchecked, fire in his veins; he’d lean forward and...

He growled and flipped onto his back again, so hard it was throbbing against his abdomen, almost painful.

He wanted her so badly, in every way; why was he focusing on the ways that heated his blood? He wanted to talk to her, to hold her, to spar with her out in the training yard, to make adorable little babies with her and raise them to be happy. He wanted her to meet Druk. He wanted to hear her thoughts on everything. He...

He wanted to make her whimper, and moan, and scream his name, his real name.

With a groan, he reached down and wrapped his hand around his cock. Needless to say, his hand knew what to do.

_I’m twenty four years old and engaged,_  he told himself.  _I’m the Firelord, for fuck’s sake. I don’t need to jack off in my own stupid bed._

It was too late. He was jacking off in his own stupid bed.

This room probably hadn’t seen much of this kind of action, in its time. The Firelord’s bedchamber was an ancient room, luxuriously built, and usually occupied by cranky old men. There were at least four passages to other chambers in the wing, too, for the Firelord’s wife and concubines. Good thing he’d filled those rooms with his idiot friends and let his fiance just  _leave_.

“Fuck,” he groaned, rolling onto his chest. Angling his open fist below his body, he thrust into his hand, squeezing harder than necessary. It had taken a long time for her to take one finger in, and she had even more trouble with two; she was going to be so, so tight. He’d have to be careful until she got used to him. (Not that his size was anything special, but he could pretend.) Closing his eyes tightly, he pictured it, shivering as he--

There was a knock at the door.

“WHAT?” Zuko shrieked, flipping into his back, kicking off the covers, and putting on his robe. Good thing it was huge and not too clingy.

The door cracked open slowly, very slowly. “Heeeey, buddy. Mind if I come in?”

“I can’t believe this,” Zuko muttered to himself. “Yeah. Come in, Aang.”

He slipped in the door and closed it quietly behind him. “Um, did you have someone in here?”

“No,” Zuko said, frowning. “Why?”

“So  _you_  were the one who screamed like a girl when I knocked on the door?” Aang grinned, flopping into one of the chairs in the sitting area

Zuko pinched the bridge of his nose. He felt a migraine coming on. “What do you  _want_ , Aang?”

His friend sobered quickly. “It’s not about me, it’s about you. We’re all really concerned about the state you’re in.”

No, no, no. This was his hyperextended elbow all over again. He wanted to die. How could they fucking tell? “Aang, it’s no big deal. The wedding is in two months. Toph will be back by then.”

“No offense, but...do you think she’s going to be much help? She sees through the earth. The fire is going to throw her off.”

“Uhhh...” Zuko wished the blood had returned to his brain, already. He was still slow on the uptake, and lack of sleep wasn’t helping, either. “That’s pretty advanced for a beginner, Aang. I mean, I enjoy adding a little fire to spice th--”

“No, it isn’t,” Aang interrupted. For a fleeting moment Zuko was alarmed; and then his friend continued, “Druk already breathes some fire, and he’ll be flying before you know it. I mean, I’m sure Toph’s going to be a great dragon mom, but she can’t really keep an eye on him while he’s flying.”

“Oh, Druk! You...you’re talking about Druk. Oh, because I haven’t been sleeping, because of...yeah.”

There was a long, uncomfortable moment while the friends locked eyes. Zuko looked away first.

“Yeeeeeeeaaaah,” Aang said. “Soooooo, about Druk. Katara thinks you should look into finding a keeper for him. You can’t be the Firelord and keep up this crazy dragon care schedule.”

“I think I’m doing alright,” Zuko said weakly.

“Um,” said Aang. “No offense, but you’re kind of losing your grip on reality. There’s nothing wrong with letting people who care about you help you out.”

“Yeah,” said Zuko, running both hands through his hair. It was past his shoulders now, stringy and tangled after forty hours of being awake. “You’re right, Aang. Thanks.”

“Katara and I are going to stay until the wedding, so we can watch Druk some of the time. And in the meantime we can find someone you trust to be his handler. Oh yeah! One more thing.” Reaching into his orange-and-yellow robes, he withdrew a small rolled piece of paper. “This came in a few minutes ago. That’s why I decided to have this talk with you now.”

“Uh,” said Zuko, unrolling the paper. A set of raised dots, and they were sloppy; that meant Toph. His heart beat hard and fast in his ears as he slowly deciphered the code. “She’s going to Yu Dao. She...that must mean she wants me to meet her. Right?”

Aang shrugged “Sounds like it. Are you going to go?”

“She wouldn’t ask unless she needs me. If you and Uncle will stay here while I’m gone, of course I’ll go see her.”

Aang frowned. “Are you sure you can do that without...you know...dying of sleep deprivation? And she didn’t actually  _ask_.”

“If you give me a ride on Appa, that means we don’t have to leave for a couple of weeks,” he said, massaging his temples. That migraine. “It’ll be the Fire Festival in Yu Dao by then. That gives me enough time to recover.”

“Yeah, I guess Appa and I can give you a ride,” Aang said, “if you’re doing well by then.”

“I will be,” Zuko said quickly.


	13. Out of Yu Dao

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one feels lackluster, but it's sort of a segue chapter. Sorry guys.

It turned out that an twelve-year-old child selling the Republic Times on a street corner is not a reliable source of information. There  _had_  been a "dragon" in town, or something  _like_  a dragon, but its handler had gotten testy and no one had seen them since. Personally, Toph felt like the whole situation  _reeked_ of Aang and his animal-hoarding antics. If there was a dragon out in the world, Aang would surely sense it and adopt it immediately. Maybe that's where the dragon had fucked off to after its brief stay in Yu Dao.

Unfortunately, there were more pressing matters at hand.

The Viper Bat Triad bullying an entire quarter of the city was bullshit, whether they had kidnapped a dragon or not. With the exception of excursions to visit friends since the end of the war, she'd made Yu Dao her home, training dozens of students just outside the city. In a way, she felt resp…

 _No, I don't! I am not the r-word for anything or anyone._ She banished the thought.

Instead of thinking too hard, she rounded up her lily-livered students, headed up by the surprisingly capable Penga in her absence, and paid a visit to the north shore.

The week that followed wasn't one she cared to remember, afterwards. Toph didn't spend a lot of time thinking about morality, but she had a feeling she'd crossed several ethical lines while interrogating and rooting out the Viper Bats. She didn't regret any of it.

—

The most annoying part was the press. Newspapers used to be a rare luxury that took months to travel from the printer to the nobleman who would read it, at a leisurely pace, with morning tea. Now, they were out mere hours after something happened, and everyone read them. Well, everyone who  _could_ read.

"This one's great, Sifu," Penga told her on the eighth day, the morning after they delivered the last of the criminals to the mayor's manse to be tried. They were in Toph's quarters in her school, making a lazy breakfast of last night's leftover noodles before Toph moved on to Gaoling. "An opinion piece by some guy named Kizu says that the evil Firelord's networked and organized the Viper Bats invading Yu Dao."

"Ozai?" Toph snorted, swinging one foot up onto the table to stretch her leg. "That guy couldn't network his way out of a paper bag."

"No,  _your_  Firelord," Penga said.

"Then they're really reaching for a story. He hasn't done anything remotely evil in, oh, nine years or so. And wipe that shit-eating grin off your face before I wipe it off for you, Penga."

"How do you know I'm grinning?"

Toph hoped she was giving her former student an incredulous stare. "Excuse me, did we  _just_  meet? I always know."

Penga laughed and shook out the paper, honing in on another article. "People are pretty pleased with us. They call us the heroic constables, and you're the 'war hero' who leads us."

"They wrote all that, and they couldn't bother to mention that I'm also the greatest earthbender in the world? Hacks."

"Maybe they thought everyone already knew that," Penga suggested. "Anyway, that's not all. You know how the mayor's gonna head up a city council with representatives from all over? He mentioned last night, at the press conference, that the city's big enough to need a police force when that happens, and–"

"Please tell me you're  _not_  thinking of joining in on that," Toph groaned.

"–he thinks the metalbending school would be perfect."

"That's so fucking stupid. For one thing, they'd need every kind of bender to fight triads. Probably nonbenders with top-tier technology, too, you know? Crime's getting organized now."

"Well, sure, but metalbenders are the ones making a lot of that technology, sifu! It's probably smart for metalbenders to run the police. I mean, we're making the new metal airships, at least. And cannons. And those thick cords for suspension bridges. And–"

"Blah, blah, blah," Toph cut in. "Whatever, I have other things to worry about. It's about time for me to keep traveling. I was just supposed to be passing through Yu Dao."

"And there's your wedding." Penga had that stupid grin on her face gain; Toph could tell from the particular twang in her voice. She'd probably get along great with busybody Katara. "So what's he like?"

"You've met the Firelord."

"Well, not really. I mean, there was that one time he marched on Yu Dao and we spun all those helmets around, and he was leading the army."

"Yeah." Toph waved her hand in the air. "You saw him then. That's what he's like."

"He was like a million miles away! What's he  _like?_ " Penga insisted.

Toph sighed. She didn't want to talk about this. It was time to distract Penga with her favorite topic. "He has nice shoes. Leather, curly toes, a stripe of gold embroidered down the front."

"Ohhh," the younger woman said. "Sifu, do you think–"

"Yeah, yeah, I'll bring you back Fire Nation shoes the next time I'm there. If you take care of the school. And  _don't_  join the police," she finished, pointing at Penga.

Penga laughed. "No problem."

—–

From Yu Dao, there were two ways to get to Gaoling: by boat or by taking a jagged route over land. The boat would have been faster, but Toph refused to subject herself to that again unless there was a need.

She also didn't mind taking the long route. Maybe she'd have an excuse to leave Gaoling sooner, that way.

Some of the older, bigger roads weren't well-traveled anymore. Overland trade routes were changing quickly in these post-war years, as centers of trade and manufacturing moved. Yu Dao was growing faster than any city anyone had ever seen, and instead of roads cris-crossing the Earth Kingdom, mostly leading to Ba Sing Se, Yu Dao was the new magnet for trade. Roads radiated out from it in practically every direction, and the road between Yu Dao and Ba Sing Se was ridiculously popular. She avoided it completely.

Toph quickly crossed over to the lesser-used coast, sometimes using sandbending to propel herself along boring stretches. There were dozens of tiny fishing villages along this route, plenty to stop at for a couple of meals a day, and she spent her nights in earth-tents, just like she had back when the gang was traveling the world together.

And though she tried not to think of it, she missed Zuko so much that it hurt. It had been easy when she was in the Fire Nation and knew he was only a few days away. It had been even easier while she was busy with the Viper Bats in Yu Dao.

But now that she was in the wilderness, sometimes it felt like a physical pain in her chest, as though a hole had opened up there and nothing could fill it but the sound of his voice. She missed feeling him train with her students, every step of his skilled footwork leaving an imprint on her mind as the heat from his fire buffeted her face. (Maybe she'd first fallen for him then, sparring with him, or hearing her irritable friend gently correct a child who had made a mistake.) She missed the way he'd pout and whine and sometimes rage after his stupid council meetings. She missed sitting down with him and his uncle and having a cup of tea and beating Zuko at pai sho so badly that he crossed his arms and accused her of cheating while Iroh laughed and laughed.

She always waited until she was alone to visit some of her memories and fantasies, because she had no idea how much showed on her face, and she had no intention of sharing that side of Zuko with anyone. Though they'd only begun to be lovers, he had already treated her to one amazing night, and she looked forward to others, many others. Maybe he would agree to make love to her outside, under the stars, in that corner of the garden where they'd first confessed their love, if she built a structure there for privacy. Who would have the balls to stop her? The garden was traditionally the domain of the Firelord's wife. It wasn't her fault that no Firelord's wife had ever been an earthbender before.

And then sometimes she found herself wishing, in the quietest way, that he wasn't the Firelord; that that particular burden hadn't fallen on his shoulders, and he could be free travel the world with her, complaining about the food and being uncomfortable around new people. (How had she ended up loving all of his most annoying bullshit? When had it even happened?)

But she was proud of him, too, for restoring the honor of the Fire Nation, even if it inconvenienced her and made him cranky.

Maybe she missed him so much because the only other thing to think about was the impending meeting with her parents, and Zuko was vastly preferable to them.

She would think of them when she arrived, she told herself, and not sooner. For most of her life, they'd been a source of pain and stress; she wouldn't give them an ounce more of her energy than she had to.

—

Three weeks later, she recognized the outskirts of Gaoling. The whole town lay over a slab of distinctive rock; she wished she didn't know that, but her long childhood had been filled with tedium, and she knew every inch of Gaoling better than she knew her own body. The town square was the same as she remembered from her rare, brief outings; even the reverberations from the Earth Rumble arena felt the same as she remembered, when she walked past it at a distance.

Her feet hesitated more with each step as she grew nearer the Beifong estate. This place and all its wealth was hers by rights, but she didn't think she'd ever be returning to it to enforce her claim. Maybe, if she was lucky, her parents would miraculously have another child who wasn't blind and a curse on their family.

At the outer hedge, she stopped. Another little walk and she would be at the front gate, where a guardsman would ask her to identify herself, and then it would all begin. She passed her hands over her face and took a deep breath, steeling herself.

An air bison rumbled in the sky above.

By the time Toph confirmed that her heart had not, in fact, stopped after that shock, she felt Appa's six feet hit the ground nearby. She strode over as fast as she could.

"Hey, Toph!" said Aang. "We found you."

_We. He said we._

A pair of human feet hit the ground, too heavily to be Aang's.

"I thought you might want me here for this," said Zuko.

She walked straight into his arms, and stayed there for a very, very long time.

"Ugh, oogie," said Sokka.


	14. Toph's Weakness

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Toph has a rare moment of weakness when her parents are assholes, Zuko acts a little more like his old pissy self. And at first I felt that Lao and Poppy were too over the top, but when I re-read the chapter, I realized they were about as ridiculous as actual asshole parents I know in real life. Anyway, enjoy a chapter with soap opera-quality writing.

Aang and Sokka, after making a few jokes that riled Zuko into shouting at them, decided to get some food in town and relax a little while they waited.

Alone, Toph finally let go of Zuko, though only to arms’ length. “I missed you so much.”

“Not as much as I missed you,” he said, sounding rueful. “I’m glad you’re not furious I interrupted your trip.”

She shrugged. “I’m almost done. And this…” She sighed. “I’m really grateful that I don’t have to go in alone.”

He nodded, a stupid gesture when talking to a blind woman. Sure, she could feel the slight shift in his tendons that told her he was nodding, but there was no way  _he_  knew that  _she_  knew. Her vague irritation faded, though, when one of his callused hands swept her bangs away from her face gently. “What do you want out of this, Toph?” he asked softly.

 _I want to know it’s not my fault they divorced. I want them to be back together. I want the rift I created in this family to be repaired. I want them to accept me. I want…_  “I want to invite them to the wedding,” she said. “I guess I want their blessing. Their…I don’t know.” She scrubbed her hands against her face, as if washing herself clean of these confusing thoughts. It didn’t work. “Pride and prestige are really important to them. I want to know that they’d come to my wedding because they care about me, not because I’m marrying the Firelord. You know?”

“So…what were you going to tell them about me?” he asked slowly.

She shrugged again, half-smiling bitterly. “Either they’ll have heard of it, or they’ll be too angry at me to ask about you. In the Fire Nation it’s pretty normal for girls and boys to be rebellious and hotheaded and do things like disobey their parents and run away from home. And you guys don’t really do arranged marriages, do you? You marry for passion. But the Earth Kingdom is different. Family is central; our people build dynasties. Running away from home is like…I don’t know anything that bad in the Fire Nation.”

“Speaking out of turn at your father’s war meeting,” said Zuko.

She punched him in the arm, almost laughing. “Shut up.”

He rubbed his arm, but whens he reached up to touch his face he was smiling, just slightly. She pulled him down to her and kissed him again. He smelled like flying, and the ocean, and a little like bison.

“Are you wearing anything Firelordy?” She ran her hands down his chest. Plain cotton.

“No, just traveling clothes,” he said. “I didn’t bring anything formal.”

“That’s perfect.” She smoothed a couple of loose strands of hair away from his face, but it was no use. He had disheveled post-flight hair. “Let’s get this over with.”

—

Half an hour later, they were escorted into Toph’s parents’ vast sitting room, where Lao and Poppy Beifong waited in their thronelike chairs.

There was nowhere else in the world where Toph felt so weak.

“Mom, Dad.” She swallowed visibly. “I’m glad you’re both doing well.”

“We heard you were in the area,” said Poppy. Her voice, which had always been soft and cloying, had a hardness in it like steel now.

Toph flinched. “I had to come visit you guys–”

“I expected you to be more contrite,” Lao said sharply. “You come back into our home, expecting to be greeted as a daughter, after what you’ve done?”

“I thought we had an understanding,” Toph said tightly. “You saw me prevent that collapse at the Earthen Fire Refinery, Dad. You know that I’m–”

“Enough!” he bellowed, standing up in a rage. “You were traipsing around the world when you had a duty  _here_. To your  _family_. Your mother and I were separated for two years because you decided to run away. We could have strangled you at birth when we saw you were blind, but we raised you instead, and this is the thanks we get for letting you live? For the shame? For the effort of hiding your flaw from the world?”

“Mom,” Toph said, tears threatening to spill over.

Poppy turned away.

“I understand,” Toph said. The tears were flowing now, and with great effort, she tried to keep her voice steady. “Mom, Dad, I came to tell you I’m getting married and ask you to come to the wedding.” She held her hand out, and Zuko was there before she had time to think, his hand warm in hers.

“You cannot marry without my permission!” Lao fumed, ignoring Zuko’s presence entirely. “Your mother and I spent years trying to find someone worthy of marrying the Beifong heir who was willing to take a blind girl as his wife. There was no one, and that was  _before_  you ran away. How will a suitor know what happened while you were gone? If you’ve been defiled? If you return and apologize, and make yourself presentable, maybe we can try to find someone willing. Not before.”

“Who  _is_ this scarred-face Fire Nation peasant you’ve dug up? _”_  Poppy asked, tears in her voice.

“My name is–” Zuko began.

“Are you pregnant?” Lao snapped. “Have you concieved some filthy half-blood–”

Toph felt Zuko’s heartbeat rage, and squeezed his hand. “No, Dad! We’re–”

“Remove him from the room,” Lao ordered the guards.

They took a step forward, and Zuko put his hand on the hilt of his dao swords.

“Please don’t,” Toph pleaded. “Don’t make us spill blood over this.”

“You have ruined your  _life_ ,” Poppy cried.

“And our lives, too,” Lao fumed. “The shame of having this blind whore for a daughter–”

“Don’t talk to her like that!” Zuko shouted. With the sharp sound of metal on metal, he unsheathed his sword.

“How dare–” Lao began.

“No, you listen to me.” The sword was pointed at her father. “Your daughter is worth ten of you!”

“Sparky, please,” Toph said quietly, but he’d been pushed to the breaking point, and he was on a rampage.

“You had deals with the Fire Nation during the first Siege of Ba Sing Se  _and_  the failed invasion that ended the war,” he said, his voice carrying and echoing in the room. The guards had long since stood down; they weren’t equipped to fight a firebender at close range. They also followed family gossip closely enough not to fuck with Toph. “You’ve built your dynasty on lies and deceit and punished the one precious child you had because she didn’t turn out the way you wanted.” He gestured with his sword; Toph only knew because she heard it cut the air.

“How could you possibly know that?” Poppy cried.

“I’ll have her dragged back here and your marriage annulled, you impertinent bastard,” Lao shouted at the top of his lungs.

“You can go ahead and try,” said Zuko, “but no one’s ever made Toph do something she didn’t want to. You should know that better than anyone.”

Toph felt her father’s heart racing and wondered if he was going to collapse with sheer rage at this point.

“And one more thing,” said Zuko. “I’m going to get her pregnant with my ‘filthy half-blood’ child  _as soon as I can_!”

“What the fuck, Sparky?” Toph gasped.

“Why is this piece of trash still in my house?” Lao screamed at his guards.

Toph heard the telltale roar of ignition.

“That’s enough!” she said, stepping forward. She wiped the tears from her face, the smoke from Zuko’s fire only making it worse. “Mom, Dad…” She felt the force of their rage through the earth, swallowed, and straightened. “Lao, Poppy, if you ever change your mind about me, send word to the Firelord.” She turned away and led the way out of the room, the guards parting for her and Zuko to pass.

—

Toph hated crying, but it was inevitable once in a while, even for her. For the first time, she had Zuko’s arms around her and his chest to lean on while she let the pain sob its way out.

“Sorry,” she finally mumbled, drawing back and wiping her eyes on her sleeve.

She didn’t want to talk about it anymore, and he didn’t ask her to; he just put his arm around her and kissed her temple.

“Let’s go find Aang and Sokka,” she said. “I want to get out of here.”

—

The brothers-in-law were playing some kind of gambling card game in a restaurant when Toph and Zuko came back. Spread between them was a variety of foods, both meaty and vegetarian.

“Hey!” Sokka called out. “How’d it go?”

“Oh, you know,” Toph shrugged, flopping into the nearest chair. “About how I expected.”

“Fruit tart?” Aang offered.

She took one. It did make her feel a little better.

“Anyway, how have you guys been?” she asked.

“Zuko has a dragon,” Sokka said quickly, as if he was afraid someone else would beat him to it.

“Fuck off, Sokka. What’s really been going on?”

“No, he really has a dragon,” Aang jumped in.

“His name is Druk,” said Zuko.

“He hatched right in front of us,” said Aang. “He imprinted on Zuko right away.”

“Zuko’s basically his mom,” Sokka added. “So you’re a dragon dad, Toph!”

“I’m not his mom,” Zuko grouched, still irritated from earlier.

“Oh, sure, not at all. You just feed him and put him to bed and carry him around all day,” Sokka deadpanned.

“He’s still a hatchling,” said Aang, “so we left him with Katara and Iroh and his new handler, Lee.”

It was a lot to take in, especially when neither Aang nor Sokka knew when to shut the fuck up. “I guess we’ll see him soon, then,” said Toph. “How long will it take to get back to the Fire Nation?”

“Umm, maybe a week?” said Aang. “We’ll probably get to the palace at the same time as Ursa and Kiyi.”

Ah, the one relative who might not want to kill either of them. At this point, Toph would be grateful for a nice, ordinary, bitchy mother-in-law who thought she wasn’t good enough for her son, and a nice little sister-in-law who would want to braid her hair or some dumb, time-wasting shit. “That’ll be nice,” she said. “Flying is awful, but it beats the hell out of boats.”

“And you can throw up on Zuko this time instead of me,” said Sokka. “The couple that gets airsick together, sticks together.”

“If we both get airsick, maybe we should both throw up on you,” Toph suggested.

“Ugh,” said Sokka.

—

They slept near Appa every night, beginning in an exhausted row, though Aang often ended up on Appa’s head, Sokka cocooned himself in his sleeping bag, and Zuko’s arm would invariably find its way around Toph’s body while they rested and pull her close.

On the third night, they rested on a beach, and Toph couldn’t sleep. Zuko hadn’t rolled towards her and thrown his arm over her yet, so she got up and wandered down the shore, listening to the waves.

It was a long time before she felt him follow her, and then stop beside her, close enough that she could feel his heat.

“What’s wrong?” he asked softly.

She listened to the sound of their breathing, to the muffled reverberation of his heartbeat through the sand, and closed her eyes. “Tell me what everything looks like right now.”

“It’s foggy,” he began. “I can’t see the stars tonight, but I can kind of see the ocean. The moon is almost full and the waves reflect its light.”

Little of that meant anything to her; but he had taken the time to describe it anyway, and it wrenched at her heart. “Zuko, did you mean what you said? About having children as soon as possible?”

“We can wait as long as you want,” he said gently. “I just said that to piss off your parents.”

“But what if we have a blind firebending child? Or a blind nonbender? How will…” She trailed off, swallowing the lump in her throat.

“How will she see?” Zuko guessed. “I don’t know. She’ll have to figure it out, like you did. Or maybe she won’t be able to see at all, and we’ll teach her how to get around anyway.”

The waves lapped at the shore, and Toph imagined them swallowing her fear and taking them far away. “Would you be disappointed?”

“No.” He exhaled against her ear, a warm breath in the cold night. “Whenever we decide to have children, whatever they’re like, I will love them with all my heart.”

She didn’t need the earth to tell her he wasn’t lying. They went back to Appa, and she slept.


	15. Return

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The gang is reunited. Toph meets some new allies and some extended family.

As Appa landed in the palace courtyard, Toph realized, to her own surprise, that she was glad to be back. She had no intention of staying in the palace for the entirety of her life, but it didn’t feel like the annoying prison she expected.

The gang was all there, and they had to have a group hug, of course. Aang and Katara wouldn’t let the other four escape without that. Zuko’s steward and a few other people weren’t far behind.

“You’ve gotta tell me everything,” Katara said.

“You’re still here?” Toph asked, punching her lightly in the shoulder. “Get a life.”

“With the earthquake and everything, we were staying in the Fire Nation for a while, anyway. And by the time Zuko left to get you, it seemed like might as well stay until the wedding. We have to start getting ready,” Katara reminded her.

“You’re the big sister I never wanted,” said Toph. “You know that?”

“My lord!” The steward had hurried over, and, out of breath, now bowed to Zuko. “Would you care for your briefing now, or later?”

“Now,” said Zuko. “But first tell me where Druk and my mother are.”

“The Lady Ursa has not arrived yet,” he said, “and Druk has just fallen asleep.”

Zuko nodded, and from the shift in his weight, Toph guessed he was looking at her. “I’ll be back as soon as I can.”

“I know,” she said. The urge to kiss him was overwhelming, but so many people were watching them, and that made it weird. She rolled her shoulders back, one at a time, and made a face, brows sky-high. “I’ll see you later.”

He hesitated, then took a half-step towards her and kissed her forehead. It was possibly the most awkward thing that could have happened.

All the officials left with Zuko, and Toph was left with their friends.

“Well, that was weird,” said Sokka.

“Oh, shut up. First you’re bitching that we’re ‘oogie,’ and now you’re bitching that we’re ‘weird.’” Toph made a shooing motion with her hands. “Let’s all go get some food; I’m starving. And then we need to get this wedding on the road so you can all fuck off and go home.”

—

She would never admit it to anyone, but there was one thing about palace life that Toph enjoyed, and that was having her hair washed. On the road it was impossible to do anything but ignore it, and even when she had the chance to wash it herself, it was simply not easy to do it without eyesight. Her hair hung down to the base of her spine, thick and unruly, and while her parents’ servants had cooed over it, they’d done so with pity. Their little blind mistress, of course, would stay secluded from the world and no one would ever be able to appreciate her beautiful hair.

Well, they were half right. It was doubtful that anyone appreciated it when she kept it wrapped into a bun and covered in dust most of the time.

After they ate, Katara had led her to the rooms that traditionally belonged to the Firelord’s wife. Iroh had had them prepared while she was gone, it seemed, and they were a sprawling collection of chambers that included rooms for servants and children. It all seemed like a pain in the ass, but there was a fountain to wash hair in, and two servants who were ready to tackle combing it out for her, and…well, she liked it.

“Toph, it’s really pretty,” said Katara.

“That means a lot to me,” Toph said dryly. “I’ll remember how beautiful it is every time I see it.”

“I’m not Sokka. I’m not going to fall for that.”

Toph laughed.

“I meant that you can be confident that it’s really pretty for Zuko.” Katara still got that annoying big sister smugness in her voice every time she referred to their relationship, and that was happening more and more often as the wedding drew nearer.

“Seems mean,” said Toph, crossing her legs at the ankles. “I’m too good for him when I’m covered in dirt, what’s this going to make him think?”

She felt her maids’ hands falter, and Katara smacked her on the shoulder. “You’re making Rei and Ai uncomfortable. Don’t be an ass.”

Toph laughed. “Sorry, but everyone’s going to have to get used to me talking shit about the Firelord. I tease, that’s what I do. It doesn’t mean I don’t…”

She felt Katara’s gaze keenly. It made goosebumps rise on her skin.

“…care about him.”

Katara made an exasperated noise, but didn’t elaborate; Rei and Ai were nudging Toph to sit up, and they dried and braided her hair at alarming speed.

“Which one of you is Rei, and which is Ai?” Toph asked.

“This is Rei, my lady.”

“And I’m Ai, my lady.”

Their voices were, mercifully, slightly different. Rei also seemed taller. “Did Iroh hire you?”

There was a pause, and she felt the girls’ weight shift as they looked at each other. “It’s not really a job you get hired for, my lady,” said Ai. “We live at court, and General Iroh thought we’d be suited to be your handmaidens.”

“I trust his judgement,” Toph said cautiously, “but don’t feel tied down to this job. If you ever want another post, just let me know. And cut out all this ‘my lady’ shit. What’d you guys do before this, anyway?”

“I’m the one of the Firelord’s steward’s apprentices,” said Ai. “He has three, so he could spare one, and I know how to do everything he does.”

“That’s handy. What about you, Rei?”

“I’m a Yuyan archer, my la–um.” Having broken off her sentence in the middle of the honorific, Rei struggled to find her train of thought again; Ai picked it up.

“She’s General Verai’s daughter. Not the best orator, though.” Toph could hear that Ai was grinning, and she felt Rei shift from foot to foot self-consciously, though she didn’t seem very upset.

“Holy shit, a Yuyan archer is one of my ladies in waiting? Uncle Iroh doesn’t fuck around,” Toph grinned.

Katara bopped her shoulder. “These are court ladies, Toph. You’re blistering their ears.”

Toph ignored her. “If either of you prefer not to work for me, just let me know. No hard feelings. General Verai really doesn’t like me, if I remember correctly.”

“It’s nothing personal,” Rei hurried to explain. “I don’t live there anymore, either, so Father can be as irritated or feel as honored as he likes.”

“And to be quite honest, I outgrew my job a long time ago,” Ai said dryly. “In contrast, you seem like the type of person who will keep me on my toes.”

“If that’s what you want, I can find work for you,” Toph shrugged. “Come to think of it, Sokka came up with this idea for me to read a few months ago, and if you could pick up the technique and transcribe a few things for me…”

Rei and Ai both left with as much work as they felt comfortable with, and Toph felt pretty good about it. She’d been bossing her students around for years, but it was nice to have people who actually wanted to do her bidding, and who were actually good at it.

“I guess all I’m missing now is a firebender to command,” she said, tilting her head from side to side to feel her heavy braid swing like a pendulum.

“Um,” said Katara. “I think you’re forgetting someone very obvious, here.”

“Oh, right.” Toph laughed. “So have we reached the part of the evening where you ride my ass for not showing my affection as openly as you and Aang do?”

“For your information, it’s not evening yet,” said Katara. Somehow, Toph had the impression that Katara was shaking her finger at her, though she couldn’t be sure. “And this is the part of the evening where we finally get to have girl talk.”

“Do I look exasperated?” Toph asked. “Because I’m trying. How about now?” She pointed to her face, rolling her eyes.

“Oh, stop it.” Katara bopped her again. “I’m really happy that you guys are together. I worried a lot about both of you, you know.”

“Really?” Toph stood up, slamming one heel into the ground to get an idea of where to head next. She seemed to have her own sitting room a couple of doors down, so she began to lead the way at a leisurely pace. “I’m not the one staying mysteriously in one place for months at a time. People are still rebuilding after the earthquake, but they don’t need the Avatar and a waterbending healer for that anymore. What’s the real deal?”

They entered the sitting room, and Katara shut the door behind them, sighing. “I’m pregnant.”

“Hey, that’s awesome. You’ve been trying for a while, right?” Toph flopped into a chair, lazily keeping the toes of one foot in contact with the ground.

Katara’s anxiety spiked.

“Are you okay?” Toph frowned.

“We have been trying for a while,” said Katara, settling into a chair next to hers. “I’ve had a couple of miscarriages.”

“Oh.” What was the right thing to say? “I’m sorry. So you decided to take it easy?”

Katara nodded, which usually irritated Toph, but she could feel the movement just enough to know what was happening. “We kept traveling like usual the last times I was pregnant, so Aang and I thought that maybe if we rested this time, things would go more smoothly.”

“That’s a good idea. How pregnant are you, exactly? Are you going to have it here?”

“Here or in Yu Dao, I think,” Katara said. Toph could hear a hesitant smile in her tone, and knew that she was trying hard to be brave. “Five months. I’ve never gotten this far before.”

“Have it here,” Toph said, with a purposefully careless grin. “I bet Iroh would love having a baby around so much, he’d stick around the capital for ages, and you wouldn’t have to do a damned thing.”

Katara laughed quietly.

“You got names picked out?”

She could feel Katara’s hesitation through the earth. “We’ve been afraid to.”

Toph leaned forward in her chair, resting her elbows on her knees. “Don’t be, Katara. No matter what, you’re gonna have some babies eventually, so you should pick some names.”

It was strange to feel the change in the atmosphere between them, as though the friendship that bound them had changed its shape a little. Toph saw herself as an unchanging constant in a sea of wishy-washy bastards, but she began to doubt that, just a little, when she realized that she actually cared about Katara’s feelings. She might not have a few months ago.

“If you’re right, and it’s a girl,” Katara began slowly, “I thought we might name her after my mom.”

“That’s nice. I bet Sokka would love it, too. What about your other kids? I’m sure Aang wants like a hundred.”

Katara laughed. It was a weak laugh, but she sounded better than she had. “Aang keeps throwing Air Nomad names into the mix. I kind of like the sound of them. Maybe Kunchen? Tashi?”

Toph pulled a face. “Tashi is alright, I guess.”

“If it’s a boy, and not an airbender, and born here, I think we might name him Iknik,” Katara went on. “It means ‘fire.’”

“He could be a waterbender born in the Fire Nation,” Toph pointed out, amused. “That’d be weird as fuck.“

Katara stayed for a couple more hours, boring Toph by asking her about her trip and throwing wedding questions in, as if Toph wouldn’t notice. She kept a count of the number of times Katara asked about colors: fifteen. Fifteen times. She was forgetting Toph was blind almost as often as Sokka did.

Toph was able to avoid mentioning her meeting with her parents by focusing about the Viper Bats more. “We got the situation under control fast,” she explained, “but Aang should be there.”

“They’re building an air temple in the bay,” Katara said. “On an island. Aang wants to spend a lot of time there to keep an eye on the city. I’m sure he can tackle the mob problem.”

“Maybe,” Toph shrugged. “But it’s not a one-time thing. It’s just a type of crime that’s going to flourish anywhere as fast-paced as Yu Dao. I don’t think he can get rid of mobs for good any more than he could get rid of theft or murder, you know? It’s going to happen. We just need to control it.”

When she finally sent her friend to sleep, she was relieved to find that her bed was huge and comfortable, with cotton pajamas laid out on it. She changed clothes and sprawled out on top of the covers, expecting to be cut off from the ground, and was surprised; the mattress seemed to have sand spread throughout it, and the frame of the bed was stone. The vibrations were dampened, but she could still sense her surroundings. If she laid her hand against the bedpost, she could actually trace the familiar beat of Zuko’s heart as he slept a few rooms away.

Before she had a chance to play with it more, she was asleep. It had been a long day.

—

Toph had mixed feelings towards Ursa. Zuko loved her without reserve, and she’d certainly been dealt a shitty hand in life, but Toph couldn’t quite get over aspects of her personality that sat ill with her; mostly that she had allowed her children to be abused and manipulated by Ozai.

Allowed might not be the right word, Toph admitted to herself. That would be like saying that the Earth Kingdom allowed Ozai to scorch a huge portion of it. And Ursa had come to court naive and inexperienced, with her parents held hostage against her obedience. It was easy to say she could have done this or that, in hindsight. It was probably much harder at the time.

But Ursa also didn’t have any fight in her, and that was where Toph could not find any common ground with her.

She kept her thoughts to herself the next morning, when Ai came to tell her that Ursa had arrived during the night. Zuko wanted them all to eat together in his dining room.

“Help me out for a second,” she said, gesturing to the wooden wardrobe in the corner of her room. “I don’t know what the fuck any of these things are.”

Ai stepped in and opened the wardrobe doors. “These are all the things you ordered before you left the capital. I had them arranged by type and color. We can sort them out later, but how about I just pick something for you now?”

She ended up wearing a comfortable ao dai that Ai assured her was red, white, and gold, with embroidery that vaguely reminded one of badgermoles up and down the side. It all meant jack shit to Toph. She thanked Ai and slammed her heel into the ground, getting a rudimentary mental map of the palace wing. One room definitely had a child running around in it; that was probably the right area. She headed off in that direction, and one of the Kyoshi Warriors opened the door for her when she got there.

“Toph!” Zuko stood up quickly, half-running to the door. It felt like it took way too long for him to get to her; she extended her hand to clasp his. She would have preferred to reach for his face, drawing it down to hers with a featherlight touch, but she was paralyzed by the fact that they weren’t alone. Again. Kiyi and Ikem seemed to be in the next room over with Iroh, but Ursa was here, staring at them.

“You’ve met my mother before, right?”

“Kind of,” Toph said, “at a distance. It’s nice to meet you directly,” she said. It was the most polite thing she could think of.

“My dear, I am so glad to see you,” Ursa said. Her voice was rich. It had all the smooth sweetness of honey, whereas Toph’s was about as serene as two blocks of wood being mashed together. "I thought my son would be alone forever.”

“Mother,” Zuko said, exasperated.

“Yeah, we all did,” said Toph. “I guess you can never tell.”

“Are your parents here for the wedding, too?” Ursa asked.

There was a brief, awkward pause, a half beat where no one knew what to say.

“Nah, I doubt it.” Toph shrugged. “It’s a long story, but I’m not on the best terms with them.” Your son may have threatened them a little, no big deal. “I hope someday we can patch it up.”

“I hope so,” Ursa said. “Family is so important.”

How did she always find the most awkward thing to say? Toph could feel Zuko’s discomfort through the earth and through their clasped hands. Was he thinking of Azula and Ozai? Lao and Poppy?

“That’s true,” Toph admitted, “but not all families are blood related. The Avatar will be there, and everyone we fought alongside in the war.”

They were saved from continuing in that vein by Kiyi bursting through the door in a huff.

“My hair is awful,” she mourned. “The comb Uncle Iroh gave me is already broken,” she said, wrinkling her nose and collapsing onto the floor next to her mother. “I was just trying to get my hair under control and I snapped the teeth! Zuko, can you fix it?” She held the pieces up to him.

“I can fix it,” said Toph. “My hair’s awful too.” It was silver. She let go of Zuko’s hand and knelt down, taking the pieces from Kiyi’s hands and melding them back together.

“Thanks!” said Kiyi. “I’ve never seen earthbending before, except when the Avatar fights.”

“The Avatar’s not great at earthbending,” Toph said. “He still has a lot to learn.”

“Can he metalbend?”

Toph liked Kiyi already. “He can’t,” she said smugly. “He hasn’t really bothered to learn. Maybe we can harass him about it together.”

“Sure!” said Kiyi.

“I don’t think it would be appropriate for you to harass the Avatar,” Ursa told her daughter.

Naturally, that rubbed Toph the wrong way. She bit back her feelings on appropriateness, instead focusing on Zuko’s anxiety. The poor guy thought she had no filter at all, and he was almost right.

“Okay,” said Kiyi.

“You can always ask your Mom if you can watch the metalbenders practice, though,” Toph said. “My school is in Yu Dao, in the old Earth Nation colonies that rule themselves now, but I bring my students here to train with the army.”

She felt Kiyi’s balance shift, presumably as she looked up at her mom. “Would that be alright, Mom?”

Ursa sighed. It was too quiet to notice, but Toph could feel it. “I suppose so, as long as you take someone with you. I don’t want you wandering around here alone, sweetie.”

Toph reminded herself that Ursa’s concern came from a loving place, not a shamed one. It was a different situation, she told herself firmly. And yet those words still set her teeth on edge.

Iroh and Ikem stepped into the room, sliding the door shut behind them.

“Two of my three favorite nieces in the room at the same time,” Iroh gushed. “What a treat!”

“Azula’s one of your favorite nieces now?” Toph arched a brow.

“She’s come a long way,” he laughed.

“Ikem,” Zuko said respectfully, “this is my future wife, Toph.” She could hear the undercurrent of pride in his voice when he called her his future wife, and it made the corners of her mouth twitch upwards as she bowed to Ikem.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you,” Ikem said, and he sounded like he meant it. “I’m sure this place could use a little happiness.”

“Yeah,” Toph agreed. “I’m the first willing bride here in, what, fifty years? A hundred?”

There was an awkward silence.

“That’s all in the past,” Zuko broke in quickly. “We’re returning to the traditional ways of the Fire Nation as much as possible now, and that means overturning the way we’ve done things for the last century. This wedding is a little non-traditional,” he admitted, “but since we’re uniting Fire Nation and Earth Kingdom tr–”

“The Firelord is allowed to bend the rules a little,” Iroh chuckled, slapping his nephew on the back. “Especially for the greatest earthbender in the world.”

They sat down to eat, and Toph tried to stay so busy eating that she couldn’t put her foot in her mouth again.


	16. Fight Me

“Fight me.” Toph tapped her fingers on Zuko’s arm, a gesture invisible to the guests at the incredibly formal feast the day before their wedding. He ignored her, as if that would stop her from poking him in the side beneath the table. “Fight me. Fight me. Fight me.”

“We’re not leaving the banquet to fight.” His voice was perfectly calm, but she could feel the mixture of anger and amusement that radiated from him like heat.

Toph lifted a broad, flat soup spoon to her lips, blowing delicately to cool the broth. “Because you’re a candy-ass,” she said sweetly, before drinking it. 

“I’m not a…no,” he frowned. She smiled demurely, a gesture that would look sweet from a distance, but was fueled by triumph. His cool, collected, very fake demeanor was slipping.

They had to eat an eight-course meal on a pedestal in front of everyone, and then talk to people all night, and Toph was done, completely done. It had taken five hours to make her hair and clothes presentable, apparently, and they were uncomfortable and annoying. Both Fire Nation and Earth Kingdom wedding traditions were elaborate, stuffy, and time-consuming, and blending them was a fresh kind of hell.

Worse, they’d have to do this again with slightly different traditions the next night, Iroh and Aang presiding over the celebrations, and then bla bla bla politics bla bla unity bla bla. She’d fucking had it. 

“Fight me.”

“Weddings are the most boring Fire Nation tradition,” he said quietly, reaching for her hand beneath the table. “It won’t be like this often. Even if you choose to attend every single council meeting with me, everything will be much less formal.”

She laced her fingers with his, waited to feel him relax, then poked his thumb with hers. “One, two, three, four,” she whispered. “I declare a thumb war.”

“I can’t believe this.”

“Fight me.”

“I’m not thumb wrestling you at our wedding dinner, Toph.” She could feel him getting irritated again, but also biting the insides of his cheeks. That was just the way she liked to keep him, seething and laughing. “And I’m not going to fight you.”

She raised her teacup and feigned drinking to shield her mouth from onlookers. “So you’re afraid I’d win, shitknuckles?”

He made a strangled sound to avoid laughing; luckily no one was close enough to hear. “Don’t call me that.”

“Make me stop, you freshly-picked pansy of a man.”

She felt his weight shift slowly as he looked around. “There is no way I can get us out of this, Toph. We’re literally on a stage. Half the room is watching us at any given time.”

She flipped open a decorative fan, which conveniently hid her mouth from sight as she pretended to cool herself off. “Why the fuck are they doing that when they know we’re not going to do anything interesting?”

“You’re a maverick earthbender who saved the city by raising it a thousand feet into the air, and I’m the Firelord who gave away our colonies and disbanded half our military. It’s rumored to be a love match but no one knows for sure Wouldn’t you stare?”

“I don’t know, Sparky. Do you think I’d stare? Me, the blind girl?”

“Oh, right. Sorry.”

Toph fought the urge to roll her eyes and laugh. “If you don’t want to fight me, wanna play circles?”

She could feel the apprehension that must be showing on his face. “What’s that?”

“You make a circle with your fingers, and if you trick the other person into looking through it you get to punch them.”

“That’s…” He was obviously biting the insides of his cheeks again, struggling to maintain his dignified image. “That’s so you.”

“It is, isn’t it?” She smiled complacently. “I mean, I guess if there’s no other option, I could always challenge you to an agni kai.”

“You can’t firebend.”

“So?” She shrugged. “You firebend, I earthbend, we see what happens. Fight me.”

“Toph.” She could hear the desperation in his voice as he fought down a bout of laughter. “Please.”

It took two and a half more hours for the rest of the courses to be cycled through. Everything was delicious, but that was little consolation when they were wasting so much time. They’d barely been able to be together since she returned to the palace; there was always something to do, and he was always busy. To her surprise and frustration, it wasn’t even entirely lust that fueled her; she also just wanted to be near him, to speak to him, to make him laugh. 

As bad as it was for her, it must have been much worse for him, she thought, because he couldn’t feel her presence the way she could feel his. As he walked through the palace, or sat his throne, or worked at his desk, she could feel the bone-deep stress in his body. His bed even pressed unevenly against the floor, and she knew he slept uneasily at night.

“It won’t be like this after we’re married,” he always promised her, but she knew better than to believe him. The Firelord was always busy; the only difference would be that all these assholes wouldn’t be around to keep them away from each other when they had a spare moment. Oh, and she’d be queen. That was something. Maybe she could buck a few more of these shitty traditions, at that point.

Apparently things had been worse while she was away, Aang had told her a few days before when they were training out in the canyon behind the castle. Druk’s sleeping schedule was ridiculous, and dragons didn’t grow out of that for a year or two. They’d called in an old friend of Zuko’s–though why he had friends in some bumblefuck town in the middle of the Earth Kingdom that raised pig cows and pig sheep, she had no idea–to be the dragon’s handler, which helped the Firelord stop stressing about that, at least.

“Weddings should always have fights,” Toph said thoughtfully.

“I’m still not changing my mind. They think we’re goofy kids as it is.”

Toph arched a brow at him. “I don’t think anyone thinks you’re a goofy kid, Sparky. But I didn’t mean our wedding, I meant in general.“

“Who would fight each other at a wedding?”

“Bride and groom, duh. The more stimulating the fight, the more compatible they are. If it’s a crazy good show, you know they’ll be together forever.”

She could feel him frowning again. “I want to disagree with you, but I don’t think you’re wrong.”

“Remember that fantastic fight we had when I came here for that stupid unity banquet and you gave a demonstration to my students?” Toph wanted to grin; she raised her fan in front of her face again, only her eyes showing her delight.

“Yeah,” he said softly. “That was a good fight.”

“We should have known then what would happen. None of that talking about romance in the garden bullshit. We should have just nodded and accepted our fate.” She paused, knowing she sounded a little insincere. She treasured the memory of their talk in the garden, of touching his scar and admitting that, yeah, she’d developed an enormous crush on him in those couple of weeks she spent in the palace, training her students and kicking his ass. “Fight me.”

“No.”

“Well then, since no one can see under the table except us, I don’t suppose I could convince you to–”

“No,” he said again, more quickly. “Don’t even ask.”

“Why not?”

“I’ve been thinking about it all night and I…need to not think about it.”

Well, that was an interesting development. Toph wondered if they were talking about the same thing. “Do you mean–”

“Whatever you’re going to say,” he said, tense, “yes. I’ve been thinking about it. All night.”

“Then let’s ditch this shit!” She set her fan down on the table.

“We just have to get through tonight.” His voice softened again. “We need to go through all the appropriate motions and show everyone we’re taking this seriously, that we’re dedicated to each other and to our cause. Tonight’s banquet and tomorrow’s ceremony aren’t just about us. It’s about the future. Yu Dao, rebuilding the air temples, industrialization…”

“That shouldn’t all be on your shoulders,” she said slowly, mulling it over. “But I guess it is, whether it should be or not. So maybe I see what you mean.”

“…and if anyone so much as glances our way after sunset tomorrow, I’m throwing them into the ocean,” Zuko went on.

She had to raise her fan again to hide her smirk.

—

Katara, Suki, Rei, Ai, and Ursa left with Toph at the end of the evening, walking her back to her room.

Toph would have preferred to walk alone, naturally. She expected Rei and Ai to tag along because that was their job, and Suki was pretty great and lived here, so that was fine. Katara, however, was pushy and obnoxious and sisterly, and having Ursa around was just weird. Toph never got over the feeling that her future mother-in-law resented her, either for normal son-stealing reasons, or because she was remembering her own horrible years as a bride in this palace. Either way, there was nothing Toph could do about those things, and she didn’t particularly care.

She really hoped they didn’t try to give her The Talk when they got back to her room, but when Katara got the servants to bring tea and desserts and bossed everyone into relaxing in a cluster in the sitting room of Toph’s chambers, she was suspicious. When Katara suggested that Rei turn in early, and Ursa excused herself, Toph was absolutely sure of it. Ai was older, and had some kind of suitor or boyfriend or something. A guy whose name she mentioned a lot. They were probably banging.

“So, Toph,” Katara said. Toph thought she could hear a little quaver in her friend’s voice, and almost laughed. “Do you have any…questions?”

If only Suki hadn’t been there, Toph would have loved to lie and say that she and Zuko had had wild sex. There had been that one encounter, but did it really count? He hadn’t even taken off his pants. And Suki, as head of the Kyoshi Warriors, knew all the Firelord’s comings and goings. She would know there hadn’t been any comings.

“Yeah, I do have one question,” said Toph. “Why are you still here? I’m ready to hit the hay.”

She could sense Katara’s irritation before she heard it in her voice. “I mean about your wedding night. I know you’re young…”

Was she really going to do this?

“…and Zuko’s a little older. He’s also, um…well, his mom was telling me about …well, that firebenders can be–”

“We don’t have to talk about this,” Toph interrupted, waving her hand dismissively. “I see through the earth, remember? I think I’ve figured out how things work over the years.”

“Are you sure?” Katara sounded worried. The other two women just sat there, ill at ease.

“I’ve busted prostitution rings in Yu Dao, Katara. I’ve seen some shit. Like, on the menu, there was this thing where you take an entire platypus-bear egg, and you put–”

“You’re making that up!” said Katara. “You can’t read!”

“Nope.” Toph smiled complacently. “The Dark One had to read the whole thing out to everyone in tribunal as evidence.”

“Who’s The Dark One?” Ai asked.

“One of my metalbenders,” said Toph.

“He and Sokka exchange really bad poetry,” Suki said. “Somehow, they have each other convinced they’re both good.”

“He should have tried to make the menu rhyme,” said Toph. “It would have made the trial a lot less boring.”

“What did they do with the platypus bear egg?” asked Suki.

“You’re not helping!” said Katara.

There was a heartbeat of silence, and then they all laughed. Even Katara.

“Okay, fine,” she conceded. “I guess we should all get some rest, because we have to wake up before dawn to get you dressed.” 

“Can’t wait,” Toph said dryly.

—

“Well, well, well,” said Sokka. “You’re finally going to be a man.”

Zuko stopped scrubbing his face with a towel and looked up, scowling. Aang, Sokka, and his uncle Iroh were all sitting around his bedroom, for some reason. It didn’t even make sense; by any measure of the word “man,” he’d qualified for a few years now. “Why are you here? I need to sleep.”

“Getting some rest before the big night, huh?” Sokka grinned. Iroh chuckled. Aang looked sheepishly happy.

He hung the towel around his neck to keep his wet hair away from his skin, a sensation he couldn’t stand. Luckily, he’d put on a robe before going from bath to bedroom. Sometimes, when he was in a hurry, he didn’t; but that’s because no one was supposed to just barge into his room without warning. This was the only crowd that could. “Let me try that again. Why are you here? I need to sleep.”

“To give you tips?” Aang said.

“I don’t need tips,” Zuko frowned. “So you guys are here to make fun of me?”

“To welcome you to the married men club,” Iroh amended, ever the peacemaker. “If things had gone differently, you would have been married for years by now. I was only seventeen at my own wedding. But then, I was girl crazy.” He winked.

“Too bad,” said Sokka. “If you’d gotten hitched earlier, you wouldn’t have needed as much alone time. That’s pretty sad, buddy. Aang told me about when he walked in on you jerking it.”

“He didn’t–” Zuko looked over; Aang had already jumped out of his chair and was heading towards the door, aided by airbending. “You get back here! That didn’t happen!”

Aang reluctantly slid back into his seat. “You said there was no one in there with you.”

“There wasn’t! I was just having trouble slee–why are we talking about this? Now I can’t sleep, again, because of you! Get out!”

“But I made us tea,” said Iroh, pulling a pathetic face and gesturing to a tray of tea and snacks on the floor in front of him.

Zuko raked his hands over his face, looking at all of them: Iroh mischievous, Sokka probably drunk, Aang excited and afraid. “Fine,” he grunted, sitting crosslegged in front of the tea tray. “One cup of tea.”

They all slid down to the floor, and Iroh poured.

“We kind’ve thought we should give you advice tonight,” said Aang. “I mean, we’ve all been married and you haven’t, and a lot of my past lives have given me great relationship advice, too! Plus, we were all talking about it and we decided you have a really bad track record with girls.”

“You what? No, I don’t. Don’t talk about me like that.”

“For the record, I wasn’t talking,” said Iroh, leaning back and cradling his own teacup between his hands. “I was too busy laughing.”

“We’re just worried, is all,” said Sokka, shrugging. “You screw up with a normal girl, she dumps you. You screw up with Toph…” He trailed off, looking bleak.

“…you just better not screw up with Toph,” Aang finished for him, shuddering.

“Better not to find out,” Iroh nodded.

“You agree with this?” Zuko asked his uncle, gesturing at the other two.

Iroh shrugged. “Your wife is a very unusual and stubborn lady,” he said, “and you are a very unusual and stubborn man. You are a perfect match, but also a perfect storm.”

Great, more platitudes. “Toph is my best friend. We get along great.”

“But sooner or later, you’re going to disagree,” Aang said, leaning forward. “It happens to everyone, and in the past, well, you’ve always stood your ground. That’s great most of the time, but in marriage…well…that’s not really a good idea. You and I both know that peace is all about compromise,” he said seriously.

“Okay, so we compromise,” said Zuko. “Fine.”

“That’s not exactly it,” said Aang.

“Then what, exactly, are you suggesting?”

Aang and Sokka looked at each other, then at Iroh, then back at Zuko. “Distract her with sex,” said Sokka.

Zuko pinched the bridge of his nose, feeling another headache coming on. So that was how it was going to be: an evening with idiots, being idiotic. They were in for a long night.

—

Long after the other women were asleep, Ai snoring a little as she was wont to do, Toph was awake. It felt like an eternity ago that she’d looked for a bit of metal in the city marketplace to make a gift for Zuko. When had it been? she wondered. The day before the earthquake, or the day before that, perhaps? The little lump had rested on her bedside for the months she spent away from the Fire Nation, untouched. It must have remained so on Zuko’s orders, the servants cleaning under it then replacing it every day. He always knew she would come back

She tossed it from hand to hand now, musing over exactly what to make for him, and in what form. Most Earth Kingdom couples traded rings on their wedding day, she knew, and Fire Nation customs varied depending on the island and town. Breaking off a small chunk of the gold, she spun it between her fingers, shaping it into a smooth ring like a potter would shape a vase. She could size it to his finger as he put it on.

She’d figure out what to do with the rest of the gold later.


	17. Job Security

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for staying and reading this story, everyone! It means so much that so many people have read my work! I didn't intend for this to be more than one chapter, and I never had any idea where I was going with this rambling beast, so I appreciate your patience. :)
> 
> I intend to put up a sequel to Fall that focuses on their honeymoon in disguise, but not for a few weeks. In the meantime, I'm still working on Rise (a modern Toko AU) and a fairy tale Toko AU that is currently unnamed and not posted yet.
> 
> Thanks again!

It was pretty hard to sneak out when her room was full of people with war-sharpened waking instincts. Still, Toph had always been a little more alert than them, even Katara; and though she  _preferred_  to make a ruckus wherever she went, she'd trained with Aang long enough to pick up a few of his Twinkletoe tricks and step lightly, landing with grace after vaulting through the open window of her sitting room into the walkway beyond.

She pulled her tunic hood over her hair as she ducked from the open corridor into the interior garden of the palace. It was too quiet to earthbend without waking everyone, but that was fine. They'd planned meeting up last night, and she didn't need to do any earthbending at all to find their spot in the garden.

Zuko was already there on the stone bench, restlessly jiggling one leg.

"There you are." Toph grinned, sliding onto the bench beside him.

"You made it." She could tell Zuko was smiling from the sound of his voice.

"Of course I made it." For once, she wasn't teasing him; she was completely serious. She raised her hand to cup his face, her thumb running over the lower edge of his scar. "You better not be having second thoughts."

"No," he said quickly; panicked, even. "I was just looking at your eyes. They're so beautiful. They almost seem to have a light of their own."

She smiled.

"I know you love me," he went on, "but I also know you won't love being royalty."

"Maybe," Toph said. "Sure, I hate formality, but also I love bossing people around."

He smiled a little against her hand, but only a little. "I just hope you never hate this life so much that you don't want to be with me anymore."

She raised her other hand to his face, forcing him to look at her, she hoped. "That will never happen," she promised. "I'm with you for good. I can't promise I won't try to convince you to abdicate," she went on, with an unruly grin, "but I won't leave."

He was silent for a long moment, but she could feel his face relaxing and knew that he was relieved. "Do I even need to say that I'm yours forever?" he whispered.

She shook her head, laughing softly. "I can tell, Sparky. If anything, I kind of want you to feel a little more pissy towards me sometimes."

"So we can fight?"

She laughed again. "Yeah."

"After we're married, I'll fight you whenever you want. In fact," he went on, "do you remember our, um, our first date, I guess? When you came over and we had tea–"

"And I said I was cold so that you'd hold me, but you used fucking  _firebending_ instead?"

He blinked. "Wait…really? That's why you said that?"

Toph sighed. "Obviously. It's the oldest trick in the book."

"What book?"

"Oh, for fuck's sake. Forget it, Sparky, just go on. What about that night?"

"…oh, remember how I was supposed to go to Yu Dao on an official trip? It got postponed because of the earthquake and the wedding, but I wanted to know if you'd like to go after we're married. It'd kind of be like a honeymoon."

"A diplomatic trip as a honeymoon?" Toph asked, making a face.

"That's the clever part. The first week will be a diplomatic trip, and then the ship will set sail for home. But we'll still be there, only we'll be in disguise."

"How will  _we_  be in disguise?" she asked, laughing again.

"It'll be easier than you think," he assured her. "A lot of people have scars, and if you wear shoes and a dress, no one will know you.  _I_ don't even know you when you do that. They've got some new bending sports cropping up, you know, since it's the first time earthbenders, firebenders, and waterbenders have all been living in the same city. We can pick some fights."

"I've got to hand it to you, Sparky. You actually came up with a fun idea." She grinned. She felt his balance shift as if he was leaning in for a kiss, and felt the warmth of his breath on her skin, but for some reason he didn't close that last little distance. She was left hanging, her face upturned, her lips parted…and maybe she was a tiny bit out of breath with anticipation. Maybe.

"We'll stay there a while," he whispered. "Uncle Iroh will be here."

"He agreed to that? How'd you drag him away from the Jasmine Dragon for so long?"

"He…well." Zuko rubbed the back of his neck. "He said he was willing to do anything necessary if it means he gets grand-nieces or -nephews sooner."

"Are you blushing?" Toph grinned, her hands still on his face. "After all those things you shouted at my parents, so loud they could hear you in Ba Sing Se?"

"Shut up," he grouched, but he was smiling. "It's nearly dawn, anyway. We should get back to our rooms."

"Fine," she agreed. "Until tonight, then."

"We'll be together all day at the wedding."

"Yeah, but we won't be able to talk or anything," she pointed out.

He sighed. "That's true. Okay, until tonight. I love you, Toph."

"I love you, too. Princess."

—-

Zuko had taken a shower the previous night, and the traditional Firelord wedding clothes had been put on him by a team of four servants after breakfast with his family. Even then, he knew it was far simpler than what Toph would wear. Royalty was usually wedded young, like Iroh had said, and the Firelord was usually not crowned until at least forty years of age. The Fire Nation hadn't seen the wedding of an actively reigning Firelord in hundreds of years, and the celebrations were absolutely ridiculous. His steward had been working with Iroh to make all of the wedding plans for weeks.

The wedding itself didn't start until high noon; so once he was fully dressed, there was nothing left for Zuko to do but worry. He realized this in front of the mirror, where he had been making sure he looked presentable. Instead, all he could see was how much he looked like his father. His face, which had been angular enough as a teen, had only grown more so, his cheekbones sharp and his chin pointy and a little long. The only thing that saved him from looking entirely like another Ozai was his scar. He closed his eyes and touched it, so that he could see it the same way Toph did. If anything, it was uglier this way: dry and dead, so deformed that it didn't feel like human skin at all.

Yet her gentle fingers always lingered on it. He opened his eyes and smiled. Who was he kidding? Her fingers weren't gentle. She was harsh and demanding, and she loved his scar for some reason he couldn't understand. He hadn't smiled at a mirror in years, and his father had never really smiled at him, either, so he had no idea what it looked like. It was strange on this severe face.

Outside, the sun was still climbing towards its zenith. There were candles and pyres everywhere, red banners flapping in the wind and lanterns swaying on their strings. People hurried to and fro with tables, food, and even more candles. In front of the palace steps, Zuko saw Aang's distinctive silhouette, talking to a few people he didn't recognize; beyond Aang was the growing crowd filling the atrium. Very few people were allowed on or beyond the steps, but everyone was invited to mill around the courtyard and partake of food and joy. Toph was nowhere to be seen yet, but that was normal. According to tradition, she would be brought out when it was actually noon.

The royal jeweler was underneath the oculus on the landing halfway down the palace steps, holding a small box. "Have you finished?" Zuko asked him, hands clasped behind his back.

"Yes, Firelord." The old man bowed low, flicking the lid open with a fluid, practiced gesture. Inside, resting on black velvet, were the items Zuko had commissioned. The first and second were a golden headbands, modeled to match Toph's favorites in shape and size; one was a simple band had the insignia of the Fire Nation in the center, small and elegant. The other was more complex: the insignia of the Fire Nation overlaid on the square and circle of the Earth Kingdom. The main body of the headband was styled as two wings that would wrap around her head, a reference to the Beifong crest. The third item, and the smallest, was a wedding ring. It was a flat, thick thing, striped with metallic shades ranging from inky dark gray to pinkish copper.

"How many metals did you find?" Zuko asked, picking up the ring and turning it over in his hands. It was smooth to the touch.

"They are the eight rarest known metals in the world, Firelord."

He struggled not to smile, an unusual sensation for him. "Very good." Placing the ring in a specially-made pouch on his belt, he shut the lid of the box and nodded to the jeweler. "You've outdone yourself, Chin, as usual. Take these to my wife's chambers." He didn't expect her to use her own room much, but that would be where she stored her clothing, regardless of where she spent her nights.

The jeweler smiled broadly, bowed, and left, but Zuko wasn't alone for long. Iroh and Ursa had arranged themselves more formally on the landing as the groom's nearest family. Lee and Druk were behind them, the little dragon tilting his head to study Zuko's formal attire. Azula was content not to be the center of attention, which she loathed after her recovery, and Ozai…Ozai. Zuko had tortured himself over whether or not his father should be included, but it hardly seemed conducive to world peace, let alone the familial kind. He was not invited.

Zuko accordingly stood in the center rear, facing the crowd. Aang was bounding up the stairs in the most dignified way he could manage, wearing his ceremonial robes of yellow, orange, red, and deep purple with a string of fragrant wooden beads around his neck.

"It's almost time," Aang beamed, glancing at the light focused by the oculus. It almost matched up with the center of the mosaic calendar on the landing. "Are you excited?"

"Of course I am," Zuko said.

"Just asking, your Fieryness. Look, there she is!"

Red chiffon was drawn over the four sides of the palanquin that surely carried the bride, hiding all but her silhouette from view. They carried her across the courtyard and up the stairs before they pulled aside the cloth. Katara, in the full formal regalia of a Southern waterbender, and Suki, in her Kyoshi armor, flanked Toph as she stepped out of the litter, resplendent in white and green and red and gold. With her eyes demurely lowered, her manner and movement the perfect mimic of a Ba Sing Se courtier, Zuko felt a moment of apprehension. Was it really Toph? She stood in front of him, but she didn't look up, and her hair and face were draped with a sheer white cloth that obscured her features. It had to be her, right?

"Today," said Aang, his voice ringing out over the crowd, "we–"

Then she raised her face and flashed him a quick grin, and his doubts fled. He smiled back, and didn't hear a word of what Aang said until he was nudged towards various rituals: washing the hands, bowing to each other and the crowd, reciting a list of every Firelord and spouse, sharing a drink from the same cup, repeating fragments of traditional poetry, and lighting the ceremonial candle and pyre when mid-afternoon was finally, mercifully, nearing. Druk decided to help with the Pyre, letting out a baby squeal and breathing a stream of fire onto it, and a lighthearted laugh rippled through the crowd, though Toph's laugh was the one that was etched on his heart.

Finally, they exchanged rings, and Zuko was delighted by the look on her face when he slid hers on, knowing she'd be able to feel each of the fourteen layers as its own substance.

Then they had to feast again until sunset, but separately, according to tradition. Toph's side of the great hall, where the women ate, was hung in green and white, Zuko's in black and red and men. The decorators had done a good job of mirroring the colors, but admiring it didn't make the afternoon pass any more quickly. It was a blur of polite nods, empty thanks and half-promises, everything that made diplomacy so boring; even his friends didn't get a chance to tease him again, because they were all being hounded, too.

When the sun began to set, it sent rays of deep gold light through the banquet hall from a low angle, illuminating every speck of dust in the air and making them all dance. As if following suit, the guests decided it was time to dance, testing the new cultural freedom of Zuko's reign. Aang easily talked the musicians into playing a lively tune.

Zuko's ring tightened on his finger. For a moment he thought he was imagining it; and then, tugging at it, that his finger had swollen. Then he met Toph's eyes across the hall and realized he was being reminded, or maybe summoned.

Everyone seemed to turn a blind eye when he snuck out of the hall with her in the early dusk; but then, that was a tradition, too.

—-

He pushed her against the wall of his bedroom, sucking the skin of her neck against his teeth until she shivered, her nails raking down his back.

"I didn't know you were this eager," she gasped. "I thought it was just me." He'd stripped to the waist as soon as they got into his bedroom, and now his hands slipped beneath her robe, callused and long-fingered and not hesitating before they traveled everywhere. Tugging her broad silken belt loose, he slipped the robe and under-wrap off her shoulders and down to her waist, leaving her chest bare.

"I couldn't stop thinking about you after you left," he groaned against her hair, his right hand cupping her left breast, hefting it in his hand and rubbing his thumb over the nipple. "Toph," he breathed. "I want you so bad."

She grinned, putting both hands on his hips and pulling him close to her. "Then take–" Her eyes widened at the erect length that pressed against her abdomen, already hard as stone. "–me," she finished, in an entirely different tone.

"Yeah," he said, laughing softly.

"Let me see it, my way," she whispered. "Please? I want to feel it with my hands before anything."

He let out a shuddering breath. "Yes. Whatever you want."

She untied the drawstring of his pants and pushed them down, hearing the quiet slap of skin on skin as he sprang free.

Her fingertips brushed against the base of his shaft first, smooth skin against the silky contours of him, veins and ridges and bumps. She worked her way down, first, to the loose, goosebumpy flesh of his sac, and then up, up, up, running over the bulbous head, touching a drop of moisture at the tip.

Zuko made a desperate sound low in his throat, and his hand slipped down her abdomen, pushing the remainder of her clothing away from her body.

She pretended to ignore him, but in reality those gasps and groans and heavy breaths of pleasure made her want him more than ever. She used two hands to wrap around him, learning the shape of the head, how it swept up to a point on the underside. She gently stroked his prominent veins with one finger at a time.

His fingers parted her skillfully, one finding and circling her clit while the other probed her gently. "Tell me if this hurts," he murmured, slipping one finger, wet with her own juices, into her.

There was a little soreness, but it wasn't very noticeable. She was  _so_  ready.

"Toph," he whispered, strained. "You're so fucking tight."

"I'm a little concerned about that," she admitted, whispering back.

"It'll be fine," he promised. "It–ah, fuck. D-do that. Up all the way, then down all the way." With his free hand, he guided her along his shaft, groaning against her hair. With his other hand, he joined a second finger to the first.

She inhaled sharply, wincing against the sensation, and stroked him harder.

"Did it hurt?"

"No, it just–it's intense," She breathed. "Almost–feels  _too_  good."

"No such thing." He seemed to search her inner walls for something, gliding along the uneven surface–and then he found it, and she nearly collapsed against him.

"Yes," he groaned against her ear as he rubbed his finger against her from the inside, pressing hard. He tightened her grip around his shaft and guided her to stroke him faster. "Just like that, yes, yes," he hissed as she began to tremble. "Say my name, Toph. My real name."

"Z-Zuko!" she cried out. Her body felt like it was trying to shake itself apart as she crested the wave of pleasure.

It couldn't have been more than half a second before he shouted wordlessly against her neck, thrusting his hips forward into her hands. She felt his cock tense and relax in her grip as a spurt of his warm seed hit her breasts, and then another, and another.

Still panting, he covered her mouth with his, cradling her face in his hands. He lifted her smaller body in his arms, and then they were on the bed, his hair curtaining them both from the draft from the window overlooking the garden. It must have been left open while they…oops. Well, no one was supposed to be out there right now, anyway.

He reached over her, getting something from the bedside table.

"Oil," he murmured, "from a plant that grows here. To make things a little easier." She heard him unstopper the bottle, then one long, luxurious, slick sound as he rubbed a small measure of it over himself. His fingers were gentler when they spread some of the lubricant on her, lingering to circle and flick her clit for a long time.

She wasn't an idiot; by now, she'd figured out what really got him going. "Zuko," she murmured, arching her back.

Hearing his name called out in pleasure, not "Sparky" or "candy ass" or any of the other names she used to tease him, fueled him like nothing else. He lifted her into a sitting position, and pulled her onto his lap so that she was straddling him. She lowered herself slowly with his guidance, until she felt the pressure of him against her entry.

And then he pushed a little harder, and she felt her body stretch to fit the first fingers' breadth of him. She inhaled sharply.

"Does it hurt?" he asked.

"No," she answered honestly, surprised, catching her breath. "It feels so, so good to finally be with you."

He took a shaky breath. "Don't say things like that. They make me want to…" He shook his head and trailed off, pushing just a little further into her, and then pulling a little ways out.

Toph whimpered.

"Fuck," he groaned, plunging in a little deeper.

It took a while for him to be anywhere near fully sheathed within her. She could feel herself stretching around him, barely accommodating his size and shape, and then he throbbed inside her and she made an involuntary, helpless sound at the sensation. Slowly, with his hands on her hips, he began to rock her against him, and she took the cue, letting him slide in and out as she pushed her hips forward and back. His fingers dug into her skin, and his lips ravaged every part of her body they could reach; her lips, her face, her ears, the outer curve of her breast, her stiffening nipples, her shoulders, her neck.

Then, when she'd grown accustomed to him, he flipped them over and began to thrust into her, as gently as he could manage when it was obvious to both of them that he wanted to fuck her hard and fast and deep.

"Let's try something else," he murmured after a moment.

"This is fun," she grinned, breathless, "but okay."

He pulled out, guiding her towards the edge of the bed and letting her bend down over it, her elbows on the sheets, presenting herself to him. He ran his hands over the curve of her ass with an appreciative sigh, and then he pushed gently into her again, hard against her inner walls from a completely different angle.

Almost immediately, she felt as she had when he stroked her with his fingers; he rubbed against that spot inside her that sent waves of pleasure rolling across her body, and she dug her fingers into the sheets, moaning.

He leaned over her, wrapping his arm around her shoulders. "Is that better?" he whispered, his lips against her ear

Muffled acquiescence was the only answer she could manage, her eyes fluttering closed. When she climaxed, her body bore down on his, squeezing hard, and he couldn't hold back any longer, either; he growled, resting his hands on her ass as he pushed into her hard and deep, filling her with a sensation of warmth.

Exhausted, they curled up next to each other on the bed. Zuko drew the covers over both of them and pulled Toph close, his chin resting on her shoulder and his arms wrapped around her, just beneath the breasts. She guessed that he had a pretty good view of cleavage at that angle, and thought he was being sneaky about it; she smirked.

"It will get better each time," he promised.

"It was pretty fucking great that time," she said, lightly smacking his arm. "Don't sell yourself short."

"It'll be even better."

"What are you worried about?" she teased. "You don't have to perform." She held up her hand and wiggled her fingers, hoping he could see her ring glinting in the candlelight. "We're married, jerk. You've got job security."


End file.
